Bonded by Love

Goodbye Christmas

2011-12-13T08:28:00.000-08:00

I did not write the following( it is copied form ucg.org )but share many of the articles opinions. I used to enjoy Christmas very much BA (before adoption). Adoption opened my eyes to so many things. The worlds poverty and our great waste being one thing that forevered changed me. I also have a friend who is a Messianic Jew. He is a rabbi. He is gracious to answer my many questions regarding holidays. My kids are not thrilled with the lack of Christmas decor in our home and I might say, I do miss the brightness of the lights in this brown season. We most definitely are not finished with journey to rid ourselves of Christmas, we are only beginning and searching. Don't worry, those of you who are ardent celebrators of Christmas, I have no bull horn and will not be harassing anyone with a different view point. Please allow me the same courtesy.

1. Christmas is driven by commercialism.

It's not that difficult to recognize what really drives the holiday in our age. Cal Thomas, an American syndicated columnist who often writes from a Christian perspective, acknowledged uncomfortable truths about Christmas in a December 2003 column.

"I'm not sure it's worth keeping Christmas anymore," he began, lamenting that the holiday has become a "road show of reindeer, winter scenes, elves and the God substitute, Santa Claus, who serves as a front for merchants seeking to play on the guilt some parents bear for ignoring their kids the rest of the year."

He asks a great question: "Why participate any longer in this charade where the focal point of worship has shifted from a babe in a manger to a babe in the Victoria 's Secret window? . . . No room in the inn has been replaced by no room in the mall parking lot."

But perhaps his most insightful statement is this: "It's instructive how just one season away from lusting after material things can break the habit. It's something like liberation from an addiction or lifestyle choice. Being away from it can cause one to realize the behavior is neither missed nor needed for fulfillment and enjoyment."

Having said good-bye to the Christmas habit several decades ago, I couldn't have said it better myself!

2. Christmas is nowhere mentioned in the Bible.

This is rather obvious, but most people never give it a second thought. The books of the New Testament cover 30+ years of Jesus Christ's life, then another 30+ years of the early Church following His death and resurrection, but nowhere do we find any hint of a Christmas celebration or anything remotely like it.

Yes, the Bible does give us quite a few details of His birth—the angelic appearance to Mary and then Joseph, the conditions surrounding His birth in a stable in Bethlehem, the heavenly choir's performance for the shepherds in the fields outside the town. But nowhere in the Bible is there any record of anyone observing Christmas or any hint that God the Father or Jesus Christ expects us to do so.

3. Jesus wasn't born on or near Dec. 25.

Surprising but true! Remember those shepherds who were "living out in the fields, keeping watch over their flock by night"? (Luke:2:8). December weather around Bethlehem is often miserably cold, wet and rainy. No shepherd in his right mind would have kept his flocks outside at night at that time of year!

The Interpreter's One-Volume Commentary says this passage argues "against the birth [of Christ] occurring on Dec. 25 since the weather would not have permitted" shepherds to be out in the fields with their flocks then.

And Celebrations: The Complete Book of American Holidays tells us that Luke's account of Christ's birth "suggests that Jesus may have been born in summer or early fall. Since December is cold and rainy in Judea, it is likely the shepherds would have sought shelter for their flocks at night" (p. 309) rather than keeping them outdoors.

Also, Luke:2:1-4 tells us that Jesus was born in Bethlehem because his parents came to that town to register in a Roman census. The Romans were well known as highly efficient administrators. It would have made no sense to have conducted a census in the dead of winter, when temperatures often dropped below freezing and traveling was difficult due to poor road conditions. Taking a census under such conditions would have been self-defeating!

4. The Christmas holiday is largely a recycled pagan celebration.

Again, surprising but true! Read it for yourself in just about any encyclopedia.

Consider the customs associated with Christmas. What do decorated evergreen trees, holly, mistletoe, yule logs, a jolly plump man in a fur-lined red suit, sleighs and flying reindeer have to do with the birth of Jesus Christ?

None of these things have anything to do with Him, but they have a lot to do with ancient pagan festivals. (Read the eye-opening details in our free booklet Holidays or Holy Days: Does It Matter Which Days We Keep?)

And what about the date of Dec. 25? How did it come to be assigned as the supposed date of Jesus Christ's birth? Historians Gerard and Patricia Del Re explain:

"The tradition of celebrating December 25 as Christ's birthday came to the Romans from Persia. Mithra, the Persian god of light and sacred contracts, was born out of a rock on December 25. Rome was famous for its flirtations with strange gods and cults, and in the third century the unchristian emperor Aurelian established the festival of Dies Invicti Solis, the Day of the Invincible Sun, on December 25.

"Mithra was an embodiment of the sun, so this period of its rebirth was a major day in Mithraism, which had become Rome's latest official religion . . . It is believed that the emperor Constantine adhered to Mithraism up to the time of his conversion to Christianity. He was probably instrumental in seeing that the major feast of his old religion was carried over to his new faith" (The Christmas Almanac, 1979, p. 17).

It's difficult to determine the first time anyone celebrated Dec. 25 as Christmas, but historians generally agree that it was sometime during the fourth century—some 300 years after Christ's death. And then a contrived date was chosen because it was already a popular pagan holiday celebrating the birth of the sun god!

Similarly, virtually all of the customs associated with Christmas are recycled from ancient pagan festivals honoring other gods.

5. God condemns using pagan customs to worship Him.

Since Christmas is supposedly a day to worship and celebrate God the Father and Jesus Christ, wouldn't it be a good idea to look into the Bible to see what it says about how we should worship God?

The answer is quite clear. God gives specific instruction about using pagan practices to worship Him—the exact thing Christmas does! Notice what He says in Deuteronomy:12:30-32: ". . . Do not inquire after their gods, saying, 'How did these nations serve their gods? I also will do likewise.' You shall not worship the LORD your God in that way . . . Whatever I command you, be careful to observe it; you shall not add to it nor take away from it" (emphasis added throughout).

And lest some think this is simply an Old Testament command that no longer applies, the apostle Paul makes the same point in 2 Corinthians 6, where he addresses whether unbiblical religious customs and practices have any place in the worship of God's people:

"What fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial [the devil and/or demons]? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever? And what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you are the temple of the living God . . .

"Therefore 'Come out from among them and be separate, says the Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, and I will receive you.' 'I will be a Father to you, and you shall be My sons and daughters, says the LORD Almighty.' Therefore, having these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God" (2 Corinthians:6:14-18; 7:1).

Rather than relabeling pagan customs as Christian, or allowing members of the Church to continue their old pagan practices, the apostle Paul told them in no uncertain terms to leave behind all these forms of worship and worship God in true holiness as He commands. Jesus likewise says His true followers "must worship in spirit and truth" (John:4:24)—not revel in recycled pagan customs and symbolism.

6. Christmas is worshipping God in vain.

Since Christmas is a jumble of ancient pagan customs invented by men, and a holiday found nowhere in the Bible, does God honor or accept such worship?

Jesus provides the answer in His stern rebuke of the religious teachers of His day, men who had substituted human traditions and teachings for God's divine truths and commands: "Well did Isaiah prophesy of you hypocrites . . . 'in vain they worship Me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men.' . . . All too well you reject the commandment of God, that you may keep your tradition" (Mark:7:6-9).

In the 17th century Christmas was actually outlawed in England and some parts of the American colonies because of its unbiblical and pagan origins. They knew something most people today have forgotten or have never known!

7. You can't put Christ back into something He was never in.

Some people admit the many problems with Christmas. But rather than face up to those problems, some assert that we should "put Christ back in Christmas."

However, it's impossible to "put Christ back in Christmas" since He never was in Christmas in the first place! He never so much as heard the word "Christmas" during His lifetime on earth, nor did His apostles after Him. You can search the Bible cover to cover but you won't find the words "Christmas," "Christmas tree," "mistletoe," "holly," "Santa Claus" or "flying reindeer."

Putting Christ back in Christmas may sound like a nice sentiment, but it's really only a misguided effort to try to justify a long-standing human tradition rather than what the Bible tells us we should do.

8. The Bible nowhere tells us to observe a holiday celebrating Jesus Christ's birth—but it clearly does tell us to commemorate His death.

As noted earlier, the Bible nowhere mentions Christmas or tells us to celebrate Christ's birth.

This is not to say that the Bible doesn't tell us to commemorate a highly significant event in Jesus Christ's life on earth. It does—but that event is His death, not His birth.

Notice what the apostle Paul, conveying the instructions of Jesus Himself, tells Christians: "For I received from the Lord that which I also delivered to you: that the Lord Jesus on the same night in which He was betrayed took bread; and when He had given thanks, He broke it and said, 'Take, eat; this is My body which is broken for you; do this in remembrance of Me.'

"In the same manner He also took the cup after supper, saying, 'This cup is the new covenant in My blood. This do, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of Me.' For as often as you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord's death till He comes . . . Let a man examine himself, and so let him eat of the bread and drink of the cup" (1 Corinthians:11:23-28).

And yes, many believers do what they consider a form of this today in taking communion or "the Lord's supper." They fail to realize, however, the full significance of these acts, or that what Paul is actually describing here is the Passover — which is what Jesus Himself called this observance (Matthew:26:18-19; Mark:14:14-16; Luke:22:8-13, 15).

And many have no idea of the real date of Christ's death and the annual Passover observance, but that's an issue for another time. (Hint: It isn't "Good Friday" prior to Easter as so many mistakenly believe. See our booklet Holidays or Holy Days: Does It Matter Which Days We Keep? for details.) The point is: Jesus clearly expects His true followers to commemorate His death—not His birth—by observing the Passover.

9. Christmas obscures God's plan for mankind.

Passover, mentioned above, has enormous significance in God's plan for humanity. The Old Testament Passover, described in Exodus 12, was symbolic of Jesus Christ's future role and sacrifice. As the blood of the slain Passover lambs on the Israelites' houses spared them while the firstborn of the Egyptians were slain, so does Jesus Christ's sacrificial death on our behalf spare us from death— eternal death.

Paul alluded to this great truth when he wrote in 1 Corinthians:5:7 that "Christ, our Passover, was sacrificed for us." Similarly John the Baptist, speaking under divine inspiration, said of Jesus, "Behold! The Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world!" (John:1:29).

Peter wrote that we are redeemed "with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot" (1 Peter:1:19)—a clear reference to the Passover lambs (Exodus:12:5).

A central key to God's plan for humanity is Jesus Christ's sacrificial death on our behalf. He is "the Lamb slain from the foundation of the world" (Revelation:13:8)—meaning His death for our sins was planned before the first human beings were ever created (1 Peter:1:18-20). Only through His death to pay the penalty for our sins can human beings receive God's gift of eternal life (John:3:14-17; Acts:4:12; 1 Corinthians:15:20-22).

Christmas, in contrast, teaches us none of this. Regrettably, because it is a hodgepodge of unbiblical customs and beliefs thrown together with a few elements of biblical truth, it only obscures the incredible purpose of Jesus Christ's coming—as well as why He must return to earth a second time! (For more details, request our free booklets Jesus Christ: The Real Story and The Gospel of the Kingdom.)

10. I'd rather celebrate the Holy Days Jesus Christ and the apostles observed.

God in His Word sets out many choices for us. Will we do things His way or our own? Will we worship Him as He tells us to, or expect Him to honor whatever religious practices we choose regardless of what His Word says?

It's always good to ask the question, What would Jesus do? The answer, from the Scriptures, is quite clear as to what Jesus did. Jesus didn't allow His followers the option of adopting pagan practices in their worship. He and the apostles plainly kept God's Holy Days and festivals that we find recorded in Leviticus 23.

As noted above, they kept the Passover (1 Corinthians:11:23-26). Scripture shows they also observed the Days of Unleavened Bread (Acts:20:6; 1 Corinthians:5:7-8). The New Testament Church itself was founded on the Feast of Pentecost (Acts:2:1), another biblical festival they clearly observed (Acts:20:16). They likewise kept the Day of Atonement (called "the Fast" in Acts:27:9) and the Feast of Tabernacles (John:7:2, 10).

Christmas, meanwhile, is totally missing from the biblical record.

Most people don't know that the Bible includes a whole list of festivals that God commanded, that Jesus Himself observed and that the apostles and early Church were still keeping decades after Christ's death and resurrection. And unlike Christmas, these reveal a great deal about Jesus Christ's role and mission.

Each one teaches us a vital lesson in what Jesus has done, is doing and will yet do in carrying out God's great plan for humankind. The differences between these and the tired old paganism and crass commercialism of Christmas is truly like the difference between day and night. Why not look into them for yourself?

I've given you my top 10 reasons for not celebrating Christmas. What do you suppose God thinks of your reasons for continuing to observe it? GN

Question

2011-04-16T11:57:00.000-07:00

Is this really how HE wants us to celebrate His Resurrection?

Who's your Daddy?

2011-03-31T18:00:00.000-07:00

These Are Not Food, They’re Pretty Poisons « Jennifer Margulis

2011-03-31T10:12:00.000-07:00

These Are Not Food, They’re Pretty Poisons « Jennifer Margulis

Need a good book

2011-03-21T05:21:00.001-07:00

It's time to purchase Orphanology a book co-authored by my brother. The book goes into great detail about the theology of adoption, shares adoption stories (including ours:) and gives tips to churches on how they can get it involved. It is sure to tug at your heart strings and inspire you.

Rob Bell

2011-03-19T06:06:00.000-07:00

I have read every boook by Rob Bell, until now. I don't know if I will read Love Wins or not. I DO know that he needs our prayers.

MSNBC: Martin Bashir’s Interview with Rob Bell

still here :-)

2011-03-12T16:21:00.000-08:00

Thought I should drop a line to the few of you who may think I've fallen off the face of the Earth. I'm still here. Actually, Ryan and I are in Charlotte, NC for the weekend. He is at a seminar and I am relaxing in the hotel. It's a beautiful hotel and I have enjoyed most of my day. I finished up three classes. I earned my Bachelors degree in Natural Healing and I am working toward my Doctorate. After doing some course work I went to shower, thinking I'd go down for lunch. Well there is no hair dryer. I also forgot to bring any underwear! LOL. So I showered and scrubbed my undies with bar soap and rinsed them out and went to dry them with the hair dryer....yeah that's right, no dryer. I hung them in a sunny spot to dry. Walking bo legged I ordered a pizza from room service. I briefly reflected on how few people in the world have the luxury of hair driers and washing machines.
I worked on the classes I'm teaching for our home school co-op. I am teaching two nutrition classes. I have discovered I hate teaching! LOL. Really, last time for me.
The kids are being watched by my Mom and Dad while we are gone and I miss them terribly. They are all busy with different things. Noah and Simon are on the middle school baseball team. Adam and Manny are on the middle school soccer team. Noah and Adam just finished the school play. They are taking guitar lessons as well, though we had to put them on hold for a few weeks. Beniam is playing indoor soccer. Outdoor Spring soccer begins for Mercy and Beniam in two weeks. Yep! I'm busy. But I LOVE my life.
I'll try to get back into the swing of blogging.
Until then....
XOXO

HE can work through us all!

2011-01-25T15:03:00.000-08:00

From our morning devotion time:

Moses had a staff.
David had a sling.
Samson had a jawbone.
Rahab had a string.
Mary had some ointment.
Aaron had a rod.
Dorcas had a needle.
All were used by God.
~ Author Unknown

2011-01-24T09:06:00.001-08:00

I loved this so much I copied it! Thanks Amy. @buildingtheblocks.blogspot.com

The battle rages on...

After writing my post on why we adopted a sweet reader left me a comment with a question. This morning during my quiet time with the Lord it popped back into my head. Her question is one I have asked myself a thousand times and one I think is so important for us to bring before the Lord.

Here is what she said:

"This explains my heart for our adoption as well. I too have lost my care about name brands, etc. However, I need advice on how to keep myself there. Maybe when we travel for court in March and actually visit Ethiopia it will be easier, but I am so selfish. I try so hard and I am easily sucked back in. Any suggestions to help?"

First I want to say that I hope when I post on here that I do not ever come off as sounding like I have it all together. Because the truth is- I seriously do not. I struggle daily- actually by the minute- to live as Christ has taught us to through His word. And, most of the time- I fail. While over the past 10 year since I became a Christian I have grown and changed more than I ever though possible (just ask people who used to know me) I am still a work in progress- big time.

I think one of the hardest things about being a Christian for me isn't believing- it's the peer pressure to conform to this world. Sometimes we do things and don't even realize that by doing them we are compromising our faith. I don't know if that's because it's just what we've always done it- or because everyone around us is doing it so we feel it must be right. Acceptance speaks volumes without us evening realizing it.

Most things I write about on here are things I have struggled with and I write about them after the Lord has brought them to my attention. And then I share on here in hopes to help or encourage someone else along the way. One of my biggest struggles (if you couldn't tell by my writing about it a lot) is the desire to have things... only, I didn't even realize it a majority of my life. Most people wouldn't have known this about me- because we certainly didn't have a lot of money and I didn't purchase the best- but I wanted to. It was all about my heart condition. I coveted what others had- and thought I needed to have it too. I believed if I did- it would bring me happiness and make me successful.

What a lie I had been sold.

And even today I still struggle- I know the truth- and yet I still struggle. As I have mentioned on here in the past- I can literally walk into the mall, smell the air and my heart will start to beat faster. I will start feeling like I just have to have this and have to have that. When will I ever conquer that desire? Even after traveling to 2 third world countries and seeing the poverty there, even after having orphan after orphans face forever etched in my mind- I still struggle with greed. I still want things I don't need and covet things I cannot afford.

Often times we will hear people defend their extravagant lifestyle by saying "But God wants us to have nice things." Absolutely. I am so not disagreeing with that. He loves us THAT much. He is so good. He wants us to enjoy the blessings he has given us. However, we must be very careful and truly examine our hearts over this. He wants us to have nice things- but if those things come before wanting Him, serving Him or our relation with Him- then they are wrong. If we cannot afford to give because we are working so hard to pay off our credit cards on those things we had to have-and if we cannot find the time to serve because we have to work over time to pay off that new car we felt we needed- then perhaps we are not putting God first...

So how to do I stop myself from being sucked back in? I fight. I cling to Him and to what He teaches me daily through his word. I pull myself out of bed every single morning early and spend time with Him- asking Him for strength to live out His word. I ask Him to help me see things the way He see's them. I ask Him to point out the sins that I don't see in myself. Daily.

Secondly, I don't go there. I hardly ever step into the mall anymore. (Can you blame me with nine kids? LOL Think maybe God knew this?) I know what my weaknesses are- and I am aware of them. And if I do have to 'shop' I pray before I go in and ask God to help me be thankful for the needs He has provided for- and to want nothing beyond those. Satan wants to suck us in. He wants us to want things more than we want God. He wants that big ol' house payment to be the reason that stops you from adopting. He wants to chain us to our possessions so that we cannot move to do God's work.

I wish I could say it was easy- once our eyes are opened. I wish I could say that change will come over night. But it isn't always- as sad as that sounds. I wonder though if perhaps God allows us to struggle as a constant reminder of our need for a daily relationship with Him? When we continue to seek Him-to turn to Him- He will be right there waiting to give us more than we could have ever wanted- for eternity.

2011

2010-12-29T10:47:00.001-08:00

Happy New Year! From the Bond family

The difference a year makes

2010-12-26T16:10:00.000-08:00

One year ago yesterday Grace and Manny came home! Today I am reflecting on this past year together. It hasn't always been easy, but it has always been worth it.
One year ago....
They had no running water
They had no change of clothes
They had no bed save a palate on the the floor
They had no parents
They went without food often
They had no tv
They had no computer
They spoke no English
They had no one to tuck them in at night
Manny did not know Christ Jesus
Grace lived in fear

They are now living with all their basic needs met. They are loved. They are thriving. Manny knows the Lord. Little by little Grace is grasping the meaning of her name and learning to live.
I am thankful for the difference this year has made, in their lives and mine.

My favorite Christmas song...

2010-12-20T14:21:00.000-08:00

REALLY!

Not only do I love this song, it is so fun to look at the guys in video that I was crushing on back in the day;)

Tips on raising a large family

2010-12-16T12:22:00.001-08:00

Someone emailed me and asked me to give some tips on raising a large family. So here goes!
So the pictures have nothing to do with raising a large family! I just love the pictures and thought I'd show you one of the most important things about raising a large family: Having Fun!
Most people like to ask me about the laundry. Our system is this: The kids bring the laundry down to me each morning (it is on a chore list). I wash the laundry and put it in baskets, one basket for each bedroom. The kids are then called to get their basket and they put away their own laundry. If you want the laundry put away properly then make sure each item of clothing has a clear and precise place to put it.
The second most popular question I get asked is about food! First, never skimp on nutrition. You are your child's teacher about health and wellness. Make the most of that. When going to the grocery make a list. I find that I save money if I use recipes and don't just make a list from my mind. I double all recipes. Plan your snacks and put those too on the list. We also are part of a CSA. For those who don't know what that is, it stands for community supported agriculture. We pay a set amount and then go weekly or biweekly depending on the season and pick up our goods. The farm is organic and close to our home. It is a very good value and I have found it to be beneficial to wait to pick up our veggies and then plan next weeks menu. What we don't buy: We NEVER buy candy, gummies or other such junk. I will on special occasions pick up a 2liter of soda, but I only do this on special occasions. People often too ask me about picky eaters...I have one picky eater. I do not cater to him. He eats what I serve. He must have one bite of everything, but then he is free to eat what he likes.
Clothing.....thrift stores, hand me downs, and clearance racks. Nuff said on that!
Christmas presents- two each and a stocking. The first year we did this I thought the kids would be disappointed. They didn't even notice. Children truly do most value their time with you. Which lead me to another FAQ....
How do you spend enough time with everyone? First of all, if you are homeschooling than you spend all day with your kids! We have tried different methods with this. We have had planned dates with the kids. We have tried special days of the week (where they pick dinner and get a fuss made over them). Though we have tried various things, it truly seems that the children's need for attention makes itself known without any planning. For example, sometimes you can tell by a child's behavior that they need some qt. After some time passes certain kids will like to do certain things with you that other kids do not and you will find that you are meeting their needs that way. I have one child who always goes shopping with me. I have one who enjoys going to library and so on an so forth.
Chores. We have tried various methods for this as well, but our current method is working the best. We have 7 children full-time so when Lauren is here then we alter the list the a bit. One child is responsible for cleaning the family room. This is all day, not a one time clean. They are manager of the area and keep everyone in check on picking up their shoes etc...No surprise, my son who is nicknamed The General is the family room cleaner. :) My teen daughter cleans the dishes at supper and cleans the kitchen daily. Manny cleans the bathrooms everyday. Beniam walks the dogs. Noah takes out the trash. Adam cleans the guest room and the computer room. Mercy is in chart of the entry way and the kitchen table. If you know Mercy she tries to be in charge of much more than that! :)
Activities. Many families I've talked to allow their children only one sport or activity. I think this is extremely wise, but we let our children play two sports each. Our kids mostly all play baseball and soccer. Activities can quickly become overwhelming. If I had known this a few years ago, we would be allowing one each as well.
Bible reading: This has changed a few times over the years. Right now though, I read the word with the homeschoolers and my husband reads the word to the 4 boys he drives to middle school each day. While they are waiting in line they read and pray together. Did I tell you how much I love my husband? ;) We have had regular reading times with dinner, at bedtime and in the morning. Our current system seems to work the most.
I am finding homeschooling to be so rewarding. It actually makes life a lot less hectic and quite a bit easier. I know that sounds crazy, but it is true. I wish and hope and PRAY that I'll eventually have all the kids here with me.
I hope I've addressed most of what my friend wanted to know. Feel free to chime in and give your tips! It takes a village afterall!

Ranting

2010-12-12T06:17:00.000-08:00

Happy X-mas! ;)

Blessed are the entitled?

http://rachelheldevans.com/blessed-are-the-entitled

Ever witness a kid digress into complete meltdown mode after his parents refused to buy him that new video game?

“But I want it! It’s mine! Give it to me!”

Entitlement can get ugly, especially around Christmastime.

And the only thing more embarrassing than watching a little kid throw a fit is watching a grownup throw one.

“If you don’t play religious music at your store, we’ll boycott it!”

“We demand that manger scenes be placed in front of all government buildings!”

“How dare you say ‘happy holidays’ to me? I want to speak with the manager!”

“I want it! It’s mine! Give it to me!”

I’m not sure when or why it happened, but in some circles, entitlement has been declared December's Christian virtue. Suddenly it’s not enough that Americans spend millions of dollars each year marking the birth of Jesus. Now we’ve got to have a “Merry Christmas” banner in front of every parade and an inflatable manger scene outside of every courthouse... or else we’ll make a big stink about it in the name of Jesus. Having opened the gift of the incarnation—of God with us—we’ve peered inside and shrieked, “This is not enough! Where are the accessories? We want more!”

This is a strange way to honor Jesus, “who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped…but made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant.” (Philippians 2:8)

Jesus didn’t arrive with a parade. He arrived in a barn.

Jesus wasn’t embraced by the government. He was crucified by it.

Jesus didn’t demand that his face be etched into coins or his cross be carried like a banner into war. He asked that those who follow him be willing to humble themselves to the point of death, to serve rather than be served, to give rather than receive.

What a tragedy that history’s greatest act of humility is being marked by petty acts of entitlement and pride.

Don't tell anyone, but sometimes I wonder if the best thing that could happen to this country is for Christ to be taken out of Christmas—for Advent to be made distinct from all the consumerism of the holidays and for the name of Christ to be invoked in the context of shocking forgiveness, radical hospitality, and logic-defying love. The Incarnation survived the Roman Empire, not because it was common but because it was strange, not because it was forced on people but because it captivated people.

Let’s celebrate the holidays, of course, but let’s live the incarnation. Let’s advocate for the poor, the forgotten, the lonely, and the lost. Let’s wage war against hunger and oppression and modern-day slavery. Let’s be the kind of people who get worked up on behalf of others rather than ourselves.

Anniversary dates

2010-12-10T13:24:00.000-08:00

All our adoption anniversaries are close together. Mercy is November, Grace and Manny December, and Simon and Beniam January. Mercy just had her two year anniversary. Wow, how time flies. She is such a light. She has the most infectious giggle and the biggest eyes. Everyone loves her. I am so thankful to God for moving me to adopt her, our little girl. I can't imagine our lives without her and I can't imagine what her life would have become without us.
Shhhhh....she and I want a little baby girl in the house.

The story of US

2010-12-09T09:20:00.000-08:00

We are watching the History channels America the Story of Us. I was told it is derived from Susan Wise Bauer's curriculum used by many home school families. It is really a great series. We finished one history book and half of another and I decided to change our pace with this series. The kids love it, though much of it is over their heads. I do a lot of narrating.
As we watched this morning, (from bed :) I began to wonder. So much is wrong with our history. Not just the US, but humankind. I used to read the Old Testament and wonder..."Are they just stupid? How can they not follow a God who works miracles right in front of them?" I watch our US history and see what we did to the Natives, the Chinese (during the building of the railroad), the Africans and again I wonder..."Were they just crazy? I mean, how could they not see what they were doing was not of God?" Look at our world today....the AIDs pandemic, human trafficking, orphans...what will they say of us? I know what they'll say. "What were they thinking? Why were they building bigger homes and driving bigger cars, and building bigger church buildings and spending millions on themselves, while Gods children are dying, are starving, are being sold."
I pray our generation gets busy reversing history.

Another kind of orphan

2010-12-08T13:37:00.000-08:00

Every wonder what happens to adult with disabilities after their parents die? They are often left alone and helpless. Join me as I pray about our family becoming a family home provider for one of these precious folks.

"For it is in giving that we receive." St Francis of Assisi

2010-12-04T17:56:00.000-08:00

My small group organized a Christmas party for women in the housing project in our town. The kids helped me fix 30 of the 50 gift bags we would distribute. We passed out a few hundred dollars in gift cards (our church gave us a generous donation) Our grand prize was a new Certa mattress and box springs. The lady who won it did NOT have a bed. She began crying instantly, which set of a chain reaction and the whole room was weeping. God presence was made known to everyone there.

We are quickly approaching the one year anniversary of my being a stay at home mom. I can say without any hesitation that it has been the best year of my life. I love being home and wish that life could always be as it is now, but things happen. Being that I'm an RN going back to work is only a phone call away and the pay is good. It's hard not to just run back to work when hard times come our way but I believe God wants us to wait out the storm. My flesh says go back to work but the spirit is strongly saying wait. Meanwhile the kids are expecting Christmas....God has always shown himself providential in our lives, yet sometimes I still fear.

Orphanology, the book

2010-12-02T05:51:00.001-08:00

Orphanology Interview from New Hope Publishers on Vimeo.

PS. Tony is my little brother:)

Thanksgiving with my family

2010-11-28T17:28:00.000-08:00

My lovely Mom put this video together.

This free scrapbook customized with Smilebox

HIV

2010-11-27T06:44:00.000-08:00

Feeding a large family

2010-11-22T12:16:00.000-08:00

This week the menu was simple! Grace is cooking Ethiopian food for 30ish guests we will be having for dinner tomorrow. Since my kitchen is occupied I am just picking up some take out. Then Thursday it's off to my Momma's for Thanksgiving dinner. But lately it seems I've becomed bored with what I'm cooking. I'd love to hear some your favorite recipes. My kids favorite is a simple pasta dish. I use whole wheat pasta (any kind really). Then I put tomatoes, garlic, onion (and basil in the summer when it's growing in the backyard!) in the food processor. I toss it in the pasta and there you have a delicious dinner. Can you share some of your favorite cheap and easy dishes?

My brother on adoption

2010-11-14T17:30:00.000-08:00

Tony Merida - From Slavery To Sonship - Galatians 4:4-7 from Southeastern Seminary on Vimeo.

Been a while....

2010-11-10T05:35:00.000-08:00

Ok, I've slacked on the blog. I intend to do better and I'm gonna start by posting someone elses blog that greatly touched me.

~~~~~~

It’s Orphan Awareness Month. Again.

Another month set aside for the church to show orphan related videos, hear testimonies relevant to adoption and orphan care, and an opportunity to listen to sermons where orphans are [possibly] mentioned.

I must confess. Many times I ask myself, “What’s the point of it?” “Is having another time set aside to create an awareness of the orphan crisis even worth the effort?” Is it? Will it make a profound difference?

Perhaps I have become somewhat cynical, or weary of the battle that rages for the lives of millions of children, or frustrated that help seems so slow to come, or desperate to see more and more who are willing to go. I don’t know. I only know the sinking feeling that I feel each time I look into the faces of our four adopted children and remember the millions that are left behind. The ones who are literally without hope, without life.

We’re the Christians doggonit! We’re God’s beloved church. His beautiful bride. We’re the ones He has already commanded to take care of the orphans.

Yet sadly, we wait.

We wait for God to speak to us in an audible voice, telling us to “GO!”—sometimes He does that audible voice thing, you know.

We wait for the perfect job to come along—orphan care demands a whole lot of money.

We wait for the bills to be paid—can’t be taking on more than we can handle.

We wait for the larger house—because adding children requires a large house.

We wait for a few kids to leave the nest before we add more—can’t be having too many children in the home.

We wait for confirmation with the perfect scripture to drop into our spirits as a sign that we need to act now.

We wait...for someone else to go.

We wait, we wait, we wait.

And while we wait—they perish. The statistics are staggering. I can’t even look anymore.

This is the horrendous reality...

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Why do we find every reason under heaven and earth why we should not go? The Bible is as clear as daylight—“care for the widows and the orphans.”

It’s a lot like missions. My heart aches when I see how many churches don’t have a fabulous missions program. God’s Word says to “Go into ALL the world and make disciples of all men.” It’s a command! It’s non- negotiable. Taking care of the orphans is a command too. We’re commanded in His word to care for them—however that may look.

But still we wait for “the call” to come. Kind of like, “I am SO glad Mrs. Jenkins is called to lead children’s church, because that is DEFINITELY NOT my calling.

Ouch!

God hardly ever calls us to do things for Him when everything in our lives is just grand. He never calls us to walk on the water when our circumstances are sweet. When I look in the Bible, I see people doing things for the Lord in the midst of impossible circumstances. Tougher than what my circumstances have ever been in my entire life. Yet, they did it. In obedience. The Lord commanded them--and they went. They accepted the tough task that lay before them—come what may. They never asked the Lord for a re-commission.

So why in the world do we? What makes us so different to the people God gave us to learn from in the Bible?

Why are there so many uncared for orphans in the world when we’re commanded to care for them?

We would be wealthy if someone paid us every time we have been told that we were “called by God” to adopt our four children who have special needs. Or for the many people who have told us that “There is no way we could do what you do.”

I disagree.

You know what that does? It diminishes God’s sovereign power to do the impossible through each one of us, His people. Comments like that tell the Father, “Sorry God, but you don’t have enough power to give me the ability to parent a child who struggles in life.” “So sorry, God. Just go and call someone else.” “Oh God, and that mission field thing? There is no way I could ever do that!”

That’s perilous ground to walk on.

God’s power is absolutely made perfect in our weakness. When He commands us to do something, He equips us with everything we need to fulfill the calling with excellence. Even people like us--ordinary sinners saved by grace who are just average Joes. He does it for His glory! To make Himself famous in the earth. It has absolutely nothing to do with us. Everything God does is for His glory, not ours.

I believe with all my heart that God is raising up an army of crazy people to do the ridiculous. Many believe we are living in the end times. We agree! We sense that more than ever God is looking for those who are willing to do the impossible. Just WILLING! God is seeking out those who will serve Him with reckless abandonment, no matter where that takes them or what He tells them to do in this life.

Reckless abandon for the sake of His orphans...simply because they so desperately need US. Come what may.

copied from: http://www.nogreaterjoymom.com/2010/11/reckless-abandon.html

Now my soap box: Why are we as a Christian community still serving ourselves? Why do we think we have to have a big spread to eat each time we come together in small groups? Why do we throw parties and invite each other only? Why? Why? We are the rich and there are beggars right outside our gates and still we serve ourselves. We are making our selves demi Gods. Now I am not saying Christians shouldn't encourage one another. We should. That is biblical. But we should be using our resources to feed and clothe the hungry and naked. We should be using our resources to finance the spread of the gospel around the world. We should be using our resources to help the widow and the orphan. WE should be using our resources to friend the foreign in our land. We should not use our resources for the glory of ourselves.
Off the soap box. I have a lot to learn I realize, both about what this means in my own life and how to speak it with a gentle tongue.
Until then...;)

I'm with the band

2010-09-15T16:31:00.000-07:00

Noah and Adam are in the middle school band now at our church. Our middle school worship center is called the Firehouse, hence they are in the Firehouse band. Noah is singing and Adam is drumming. I'm proud of this accomplishment. They will be singing praises to The King in front of their peers. They also will be filling their minds with more and more praise songs!
... Aren't they too cute?

Onions make me cry

2010-09-14T05:22:00.000-07:00

One of my motivations for homeschool was Beniam. He never really attached to me. I do not want to minimize the pain of those dealing with RAD. We were never dealing with RAD. He has always been sweet, easy to love and respectful. There was just always something missing. Our only real issue with him was his picky eating habits. Though we did not cater to them, at times we would scold him for not eating the healthier option during meal time. After a few months of his being our son, we eased up a bit on the pressure for him to eat everything. At that point it became obvious to us that this was not about food, it was about something much deeper. I have to back up and point out that he began sitting in my lap on occasion since we started homeschool. Big progress. Well Sunday we hit another monumental achievement for him. We went to a local buffet after church. One of the other children exclaimed "Look at Beniam's plate!" I looked up expected to see a pile of fried chicken and there it was....a small salad!!! He had a huge smile on his face, just for me I believe and he said "I'm gonna try to eat a little." Yesterday we ended up in our neighbor city with an hour to kill before an appointment so we went out for lunch. He wanted a meatball grinder. I ordered it and it was filled with onion and peppers. Always in the past he would gag, literally, at the sight of onions and peppers. He'd gag, his eyes would water and he'd look like he'd been injured. This time he looked up at me with a big smile and said "I'm going to eat the onions and peppers this time. He took slow bites and then as we all sat in hushed silence he said "I think I like onions and peppers. I think I'll start putting some onions on my food!" I cried, for real. I knew deeper what this meant. Beniam, also being very shy would never sing in front of anyone. We'd catch him singing and dancing in a room alone but the minute we'd walk in he'd stop. Guess what? Yes! He is also singing and dancing. And so am I.

Homeschool bliss and other stuff...

2010-09-08T07:44:00.000-07:00

We started homeschooling when our other kids went back to school. Today is the 4 week anniversary. For those of you who aren't in on the history, we have 4 in public middle school, 3 at home and my step-daughter is out of state. This is my first year of homeschooling. So far..... I LOVE IT! I love it for many reasons. To name a few: NO homework to help them with. NO notes that their lunch account is over drawn. NO list of supplies the teachers need. NO projects! NO permission slips! OK so that is just the "NO's" that I love. I also love: sleeping later. The kids having healthier breakfast and lunch. Getting to spend my day with some of my favorite people. My new homeschool friends. Getting to learn things again with my children. Beniam sitting on my lap. (That's my favorite. He would never sit on my lap before. Though he has always been easy to love and be with he never really seemed to attach to me, until now.) Field trip Fridays with Dad. Reading. Praying together more often. Enjoying good weather days. My house is cleaner. Yes, I said cleaner. :-)
As you can tell by my blogging, my grammar is very lacking! LOL. Hopefully you'll see it improve as I help the kids with their lessons.
Another thing going on around the Bond household is a focus on nutrition. We have many documentaries on eating well. The kids are enjoying them and participating in cooking healthier foods. We have decided to give God our stomaches. Sounds strange? It really shouldn't be. We give him our time and talents, we give him our hearts, why shouldn't we also give him our stomachs? He provided us food to eat, we should enjoy that food. Only that food. Our culture has gotten so far away from the teachings of scripture and the life abundance that Christ came to offer us. We have perverted his idea of family. We have perverted the physical world around us. We have perverted sex and dare I say it....We have perverted food. He gave us all we need for sustenance and we have added addictive substances to it. We have devitalized the soil. We have turned agricultue into capitalism. So I have decided I am giving God my stomach. If anyone is interested on the resources I am reading or watching please email me at: afrosandtiaras@yahoo.com.
Peas and Love ;)

Since we last "talked"

2010-08-11T05:05:00.000-07:00

School started for my middle schoolers. Hopefully I'll home school more than three next year. Happy was perched ready to ride to school too as she has these last several years. I love that little aggravater.
Noah celebrated his 12th birthday. Adam celebrated his 13th!
Lauren went back home last week. We miss her and look forward to seeing her on fall break.
Our biggest news so far is that Adam, my step-son is living with us now! It is a dream come true for us. We realize that it is going to be difficult but we have coined a family slogan here: "Do hard stuff." We are ready! The night before school started after our family devotions we went around the table and did our highs and lows for the Summer. Everyone said their high was having Adam here. I could tell how that filled him up. We are so thankful.

We turned our guest room into a school room! I can't believe how excited I am about homeschooling! We start......TODAY! Right after Jazzercise;) First things first.

We sold our microfiber sectional, as I was tired of having it cleaned, and bought a used leather sectional. It fits all of us, until the kids grow! What it didn't fit was our family room! Ha. Next time I'll measure. We also had hard wood put in our downstairs. We don't have a large house for our family size. Our home is 2100 square feet and 9 of us live here full time. I think it's plenty big enough, but often folks come over and say "You need a bigger house." I hate this comment really, because my kids lived in one room before coming to America. One room. We have five bedrooms. We can make due.

My garden is doing pretty good. I am an amateur gardener. (Which is likely evident by the photos:). We have two 7 layer above ground organic beds. This is our second year. I LOVE it! I also started a Dahlia garden, my favorite flower. It's looking a little sickly right now but I have high hopes for the next few years as the plants roots mature. (Much like us really!) We have been watching many food documentaries with the kids. They seem to enjoy learning about what they should eat and where it should come from. Though these films are not Christian in nature it is beautiful and tragic to see what God intended for our land and where capitalism has taken it. The children seem to like hearing what they should eat from a film rather than hearing what they shouldn't eat from their Mom! Go figure!

SGI

2010-07-21T12:39:00.000-07:00

Last week we enjoyed a family vacation at St George Island. It was a short 12 hour drive in a 15 passenger van:-) We spent the week soaking up the water and the rays with my parents, my in-laws and my brothers family. Grace and Manny got to experience the beach for the first time. We also celebrated Mercy's birthday...with a lot of chocolate!

Let me tell you something....

2010-07-09T16:45:00.000-07:00

So today I went to visit with a sweet little old lady. As she was sharing about her life she asked me "How many children do you have?" I said "8". She said "Wow! Everyone thought I was crazy for having 4." I told her "5 of mine are adopted." She says to me: "You must be a very good person. Its disgusts me all these people going to other countries to adopt children when there are perfectly good children here." I said nothing in response. I'm somewhat used to this at this point. But you know what I really wanted to say: "You find find it disgusting that an orphaned child gets a home? You somehow deem American children superior to other children in the world? You think we are to turn a blind eye to the millions of children in the world who have no parents because they don't live in the US? Really? I am Christian. I do not identify myself as an American. Christ follower is the only title I will ever need."

Another

2010-07-07T16:41:00.001-07:00

"You won't share your fame."

2010-07-05T08:25:00.000-07:00

So happy!

2010-06-24T18:26:00.001-07:00

I get to be Auntie Lisa again and one more orphan has a home!

Summer Break!!!!

2010-06-09T11:16:00.000-07:00

Today was the last day of school! Ryan and I visited the kids for their awards ceremonies. Mercy earned the "friendly" award, no surprise to us as she's always greeting people with a happy face. Ben earned the "citizenship" award and Math award! His teacher said someday he'll be president! :-) Simon earned a Math award. Noah earned 6 or so awards including the Presidential award. Grace and Manny win an award from me for being such good troopers, this their first semester of school in America.
Adam and Lauren will be here before we know it to spend the summer. I have made our family schedule with our meal plan, game times, tv times, chores, homework and reading time, devotional time.....think that's all that's on the schedule. What's not on it is all our visits to the water park and the baseball park! We can get a summer pass to our water park for 200$ That's pretty great for 10 of us, unlimited access to the pools!
We are soon getting hardwood put in our downstairs. Why oh why did I not do that to begin with? Next up a leather couch, so I'm not paying to have this one cleaned.
I am planning my first home school year! Mercy, Beniam and Grace will be my first students. I'm praying the Teabow bill passes (allowing home school students to play sports in public school) then I'll be homeschooling the rest. (Unless of course I totally flop at this first attempt!) Any encouragement would be much appreciated.

Merry Merry Month of May

2010-06-01T13:57:00.000-07:00

We have been really busy having fun this month. We have celebrated Mercy's completing kindergarten, attended a middle school choral concert, went hiking with grandparents, played a lot of baseball, went to a church picnic, celebrated birthdays (Ryan, me and my Dad), visited Kings Island, and celebrated Mothers Day.
Enjoy a few photos!
Now I am preparing for the kids to be home for summer, making our calendar and menu. Can't wait to have the kids home!

2010-06-01T13:28:00.001-07:00

Have I mentioned how beautiful I think all of my kids are;-)

His-story

2010-05-28T07:39:00.002-07:00

7 years ago I had one child. I was a single Mother, divorced from my sons Ethiopian father. I was codependent, bitter and far from God. One Sunday morning I watched Southland Christian Church on TV and was blown away. I had never heard such practical teaching. I visited that night. Shortly later I'd surrender my life to Christ. MY soul looked like one of those houses on hoarders. It would take a long time to clean up one of those houses and it would take years to clean me up as well. Occasionally there's a box or two in my house still. :-)
6 years ago I remarried. We would grow in Christ together. With my new husband came two more children. So, 6 years ago I became the mother to three.
After being married a year, I went through the curriculum by Neil Anderson, Victory over the Darkness. Through that study I learned of my identity in Christ. My adoption into God's family, and God's desire for his children.
4 years ago, sitting in Church watching a video about Ethiopian orphans, God spoke to me.
3 years ago in January, I became the mother of 5.
Not long after being home, we found that our new son had left behind some siblings. He particularly grieved for the little sister he had left behind. We went to Southland and they prayed over us that she would be found. One orphan in 3 million. She was found three days later.
Less than two years ago, I became the mother of 6.
While we were in Ethiopia, our son asked if we would find his older brother and sister and give them the money he had in his bank account.
This December I became the mother to 8.
Ain't God great?

Today I sit in my air conditioned house, food in the refrigerator, flowers blooming outside, kids at school, and I am feeling a mix of blessing and distress. Why do I get to live this blessed existence? Why have I been given AND forgiven so much?
Someday I hope to tell my WHOLE story. I AM a miracle.

Listen, far-flung islands,
pay attention, faraway people:
God put me to work from the day I was born.
The moment I entered the world He named me.
He made me His straight arrow and hid me in His quiver.
He said to me, "You're my dear servant, through whom I'll shine."
Yes, God took me in the hand from the moment of birth to be His servant,
to bring His people back home to Him.
What an honor for me in God's eyes!
And now He says, "But that's not a big enough job for my servant-
just to recover your own family, merely to round up
the strays of your own people.
I'm setting you up as a light for the nations
so that my salvation becomes global!"
-Paraphrased from Isaiah 49:1-6 MSG as published in One Million Arrows.

King Stefan, sisters, baseball

2010-05-20T05:09:00.000-07:00

Simon was recently in the school production of Sleeping Beauty. He made a dashing King Stefan. Costume, as all our costumes, was made by my Momma.
It's the time of year that we spend most evenings at the baseball field. I LOVE it! Our boys are very talented and watching them play is pure joy for me! As you can see the fans are enjoying themselves.
We have decided that homeschool seems like the best option for Grace. She is excited about it. Anyone have a Rosetta Stone English program they'd like to sell? It's not coming as quickly as I'd like this time.
Sunday evening I will be speaking at a late Mothers Day event at a local church, Grace Christian. The FREE event is 4-6pm. I'd love it if you locals could make it!

for fun

2010-05-17T07:26:00.000-07:00

Radical

2010-05-05T15:52:00.000-07:00

Radical by David Platt from Taylor Robinson on Vimeo.

Happy birthday Grace!

2010-05-02T05:14:00.000-07:00

Grace got to have her first birthday celebration. She requested that our family and a couple other families that we hang out with go to lunch at Golden Corral for her big day. I guess when you've been hungry most of your life a buffet feels like heaven. She is very sweet and watching her navigate the unfamiliar territory of opening presents was a blessing. Ryan and I gave her money. She is attending an ESL night class and they have been learning about shopping and spending money, so we thought it fitting that we give her money and let her spend it! So us girls headed to Target after lunch. What does a teenager a few months new to this country buy with 100.00? First she says she will give 10.00 to church, the "bible say to." Then she bought soap, a headband, two sets of hair barrettes, an artificial flower, and some pens. No Clothes! Can you believe it? I would have spent 100 dollars and some odd cents on clothes and had to bum from my Mom at the check out. She is too modest for most any clothes in any store. It is an odd position to be in with her. She is teaching me so much about my own insecurities and heart problems. She tells us often of the things Jesus does not like (seems like everything) and I so long to sit down and teach her about Grace and about freedom. The irony is though that she is revealing much about grace and freedom to me. Daughters are much more difficult for me than sons, with daughters there is no hiding. With daughters you have to work out the ugly or pass it on. I have chosen to work it out. Click the following link to play video:
http://secure.smilebox.com/ecom/openTheBox?sendevent=4d5459304e4459784f546c384d7a51344f5449314d7a553d0d0a&sb=1

Surrender

2010-04-22T05:30:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday we attended our old church . It was as always amazing. It is an inter-denominational Christian church. To the back right of me there was a Franciscan Monk, to the front right of me was a lady who appeared to have been forgiven much, to the left of Ryan and I, our kids (minus the youngest two). We all sang and shouted together "I know my God saved the day and I know his word never fails and I know my God made a way for meeee....Salvation is here...CAUSE YOU ARE ALIVE AND YOU LIVE IN ME... It was so beautiful. Being there and worshiping with song. It reminded of Acts chapter two where it says the early church had "everything in common". The Everything being the Only thing that matters.
We had some visitors who are filming a documentary on Human Trafficking. They are not from IJM as far as I know, but IJM is an organization we donate to and lift in pray. From the ijm.org website:

"Today, millions of lives around the world are in the grip of injustice.
More children, women and men are held in slavery right now than over the course of the entire trans-Atlantic slave trade: Millions toil in bondage, their work and even their bodies the property of an owner.

Trafficking in humans generates profits in excess of 12 billion dollars a year for those who, by force and deception, sell human lives into slavery and sexual bondage. Nearly 2 million children are exploited in the commercial sex industry. The AIDS pandemic continues to rage, and the oppression of trafficking victims in the global sex trade contributes to the disease’s spread.

In many countries around the world, pedophiles find that they can sexually violate children with impunity. And though police should be protectors, in many nations, their presence is a source of insecurity for the poor. Suspects can be held interminably before trials, imprisoned for crimes they did not commit.

The land rights of women are violated on a massive scale worldwide, but with particular ferocity in Africa, leaving widows and other women in vulnerable positions unable to care for themselves or their children. Around the world, women suffer the double indignity of rape and seeing their perpetrators face no consequences for crimes of sexual violence.

Often lacking access to their own justice systems and unable to protect themselves or their families from those more powerful, it is overwhelmingly the poor who bear the burden of these abuses."

I've been consumed with thoughts of the least of these. I want to help those who've been trafficked. I want to love and not hate the perpetrators. I want to be a foster Mom. I volunteered with a refugee ministry. I want to adopt a baby with Down Syndrome...I feel like I can't do it all. BUT who am I to limit GOD? He is limitless. He is boundless in love and like we shouted Sunday "He lives in me!" I don't know what the future holds for my family, but I know who holds the future. Please pray for me as I try to spread the fire inside me.

May God bless you with a restless discomfort about easy answers, half-truths, and superficial relationships,
so that you may seek truth boldly and love deep within your heart.

May God bless you with holy anger at injustice, oppression, and exploitation of people, so that you may tirelessly work for justice, freedom, and peace among all people.

May God bless you with the gift of tears to shed with those who suffer from pain, rejection, starvation, or the loss of all that they cherish, so that you may reach out your hand to comfort them and transform their pain into joy.

May God bless you with enough foolishness to believe that you really can make a difference in this world, so that you are able, with God's grace, to do what others claim cannot be done.

And the blessing of God the Supreme Majesty and our Creator, Jesus Christ the Incarnate Word Who is our Brother and Savior, and the Holy Spirit, our Advocate and Guide, be with you and remain with you, this day and forevermore. Amen.
-Franciscan benediction.

Fun in NOLA

2010-04-12T11:15:00.000-07:00

We are home safe and sound. Had a blast. We were all wishing for another Spring Break this morning @ 6:30!

God knew

2010-04-09T07:10:00.000-07:00

The kids are on Spring Break this week. We headed down to Mississippi to visit family and we are now in New Orleans taking in the sights. Since we've been on break we have enjoyed both Beniam's birthday AND the Easter Holiday.

Beniam turned 7! Hard to believe. He was 3 (soon to be 4) when we brought him home from Ethiopia. He had a hard three years. Orphaned and living on the street. But God knew. God knew that he'd be with us soon. He even knew he'd celebrate his 7th birthday party at Gattitown in Mississippi.

Those eyes. They gripped me when I saw his referral pictures. I knew he was mine.

Easter morning at my brothers house with ten kids. That's a lot of chocolate bunnies.

My handsome sons dressed for church. Our church is casual so this was cause for a picture.
Will post pics soon from NOLA!

Family pictures

2010-03-30T06:36:00.000-07:00

Faith and the plant

2010-03-28T12:55:00.001-07:00

This plants sits in the hallway of one of the buildings where I work.(I am an RN and work in home health.) It's my friendly little reminder of how my faith should grow...undignified into the light of the SON. Relying on him for growth and nourishment.
We talked about faith this morning at church. The following is from our church program:
Faith trusts Jesus even through the storms of life.
Faith takes risks at the Lord's bidding.
To walk by faith focuses on Jesus, not the wind and waves.
Faith forces us to stretch beyond our personal potential.
Faith motivates us to learn from failures, not to repeat them.
My faith has stretched me, challenged me, scared the life out of me. I am so excited to see where it takes me next. Lead me Lord Jesus.

A world where Momma's die

2010-03-23T17:33:00.000-07:00

I struggled with whether or not to share this. I don't wish to use this blog to exploit my children in anyway. Though this is personal, I wish to share, maybe someone needs to be reminded of this reality for MILLIONS of children.
Simon said he had a memory of the day his Mother died. He talked with Grace about it and she said it was true. The day their sweet Mother was buried a young Grace threw dirt over her Momma's grave, wept and said to her dead mother "I will come and eat lunch with you tomorrow." She told me Mercy was 11 months old and she remembers slapping her that day too. She said "Me don't know why me (then she acted out slapping her)." She said Simon played outside that day in his underwear.
I left the room after this conversation and cried. Millions of little girls throw dirt on their Mothers graves each day. Millions.
The greatest thing I will ever accomplish in this life is the drying of those tears.

Soccer Mom

2010-03-17T07:27:00.001-07:00

The boys, two of them anyway, had their first middle school soccer game. Prior to the game, Manny (home this Christmas) was so child-like. He wore his uniform around so proud. He pounded his chest and said "Teleko foto's of me Momma." (Lots of foto's). Here are a sampling. They played great. Oh and they won!

Matthew 25, a paraphrase of v. 35 & 36

2010-03-15T17:29:00.000-07:00

For I was hungry, while you had all you needed. I was thirsty, but you drank bottled water. I was a stranger, and you wanted me deported. I needed clothes, but you needed more clothes. I was sick, and you pointed out the behaviors that led to my sickness. I was in prison, and you said I was getting what I deserved. (RESV - Richard E. Stearns Version)

Story

2010-03-14T16:32:00.001-07:00

Donald Miller spoke at our old church today. We obviously went, the proof in the picture. I have read every book of his. I hold Blue Like Jazz in the honorable position of being my favorite all time book. No it isn't the deepest of theology, it's light and funny but somehow in the light and funny there is great depth and humility if you'll look deep you see it. The book moves me, like music. When I turned the last page I was deeply sad and felt like I was leaving the dance floor.
The last Miller book I read was A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. It is a book about story. I think I blogged about it previously. Miller covers the content of story: a character; a conflict; and a challenge to overcome. If you think about your favorite movie, no doubt it would have these three elements. Our lives are greater stories than we see on the big screen...or they could be, should be. If you turned over the blockbuster cover to your life what would the narrative say?
All this said about Miller and his books, you can imagine my excitement.
We arrived at church almost 30 minutes early. While we were waiting for the first service to end he came out and I nearly tackled him! LOL! This is a horrible picture of me (The glare from the light made me look like I have two noses:() BUT it is my moment with Miller. My moment where I got to tell him how much I enjoy his books and I was privileged to introduce my children to him, telling him some of our story. He was most gracious to us all. He told the kids "I'll see you guys some day on a magazine or in a movie." Referring to the obvious beauty of my kids.
The message he delivered today was beautiful. If interested you can hear it at: WWW.southlandchristian.org.
After the service we went out for Thai food. We declared it Donald Miller day! The kids enjoyed his message as well. As we ate our food we discussed our family and our story, the one we have already written and the chapters that lie ahead...I'm itching to keep writing a good story.

It's over...

2010-03-13T05:19:00.000-08:00

As you know I went back to work on the 4th. (I work in home health, my position was RN, ADPS. ADPS meaning Assistant Director of Professional Services.) Two days before I was scheduled back to work I told my boss of my intention to work PRN (as needed). She told me to come on in on the 4th. During our morning meeting we negotiated that I would continue my full-time status until the end of March. The first two days were ok. This past week? Whew! Kicked my butt. I came home Thursday to dishes, homework help, laundry and wanted to cry. Yesterday I told my boss I can't do it. So officially I only work PRN! Which is looking like 4 or 5 hours on Tuesday and 4 or 5 hours on Thursday. I am so excited and so Thankful. Thanks be to the most high God! The God who provides!
Now anyone want to share some cost cutting tips?
I have other more exciting news...I am going to be an aunt again. My brother Tony and his wife Kim have decided to move forward with an Ethiopian adoption and have accepted the referral for a little boy, Eyasu (Joshua)7 years old and too cute for words. Join me in praying for this little guy and for these faithful parents.

Once upon a

2010-03-07T16:18:00.000-08:00

Mattress! Noah was in the school play this weekend, Once Upon a Mattress. He played Minstrel. He did a fantastic job and sang really well. As always we are very proud of him. Enjoy a few pictures.

We are enjoying warm weather this weekend. We enjoyed some time outside and I found this monkey in my tree:

Lessons I'm learning through my daughter...and other ramblings

2010-03-03T04:18:00.000-08:00

The adjusting period is still going good. Manny and Noah are now on the middle school soccer team together. They are having fun playing at this level. Manny is outgoing and talkative. Grace is another story...
I long for her to talk to me, really talk to me....ask me for things. She talks to the children upstairs, I hear her. When she is with Ryan and I, she only answers questions. She is polite and smiles a lot. I don't believe she is unhappy. I believe she is trying to be respectful of us. Spiritually this has made me reflect on prayer. Father God longs for us to talk to him. He longs for us to ask him for things. He gives us things when we don't ask for but he doesn't give us other things we need because we do not ask. Strange as it may seem this is what bothers me the most about my daughter, she doesn't ask me for anything. I want her to ask. As I realize this I realize God the Father wants his children to as too. I am asking more...
She had to have a root canal yesterday. It was by far the worst visit dental, medical or otherwise that I have experienced as a parent. We had David explain what was going to happen to her on the phone prior to the visit. Though I don't know exactly what he said, historically he sugar coats things so I do not believe he caused her fear. When Simon was finished and it was her turn, she walked forward and backward toward the chair at the same time. She lay down and began to cry softly. She cried out "Mommy!" and another word I did not understand. I sat with her and held her hand. The dentist talked softly to her. She began to tremble all over. Her arms and legs were even trembling and she was making whimpering noises. All I could do was hold her hand and put my head down and pray. (and cry!)
Again I reflect on God the Father and how he watches his children experience pain and fear. It must break his heart too, but he holds our hands and sings over us as the scriptures say.
Tomorrow I am to return to work. I emailed my boss to let her know that I will not be returning full-time,I will work PRN (as needed). Pray that this news will be taken well. I have paid our insurance payments until March 19th and need them to be gracious to allow me to keep my insurance that long. I am so excited about the future. I have never been a stay at home Mom. When Noah was a baby I stayed home during the week (mostly) and worked the weekends. That is the closest I have ever been to being a SAHM. Without a doubt this 3 month period has been the best of my life. I love being here with my kids. I love greeting them when they come in from school and talking to them as I cook dinner, not preoccupied with all the things I have yet to do!
Word to the stay at home Mom community: Many of you said hurtful things intentionally or not to me about working outside the home. Please be careful not to judge other women and remember that most working Mom's are already full of guilt about working. You telling them how important staying home is doesn't help them, it adds to their guilt. We never know what another family is facing financially. We don't where others are spiritually. We have to love people where they are. Believe me I struggle with doing this too.
Now some odd ramblings...
Sunday afternoon as Ryan relaxed on the couch Happy used him as a pillow..

For fun Mercy likes to put lotion on Ryan legs and feet and comb his "weg and toe hair". He is shameless to allow this! But we all think it's really funny:-)

Valentines Day

2010-02-23T14:04:00.000-08:00

My computer has been out for repairs so I haven't been able to post this until now!
We had four families over for Valentines dinner. We read many scriptures from Gods word about how He loves us before saying the blessing. We had a meal of salad, pasta, garlic bread and finished the meal off with cupcakes and NY style cheesecake. The kids ate in the kitchen and the grown folks ate in the living room, turned dining room for the evening. We shared stories about how we met our spouses. It was a warm fuzzy evening I will remember in the years to come.

Ryan wore red plaid pants. I wish you could see the color.

My friend Jennifer with my youngest daughter.

My Valentines and ME!

After dinner talk...

Kids tables.

My converted family room.

Books and Grace

2010-02-02T13:56:00.001-08:00

Who holds your hand when you feel bad? I love this sweet picture.

Is that Jack Sparrow, Beyonce or Mercy Bond?

We've started reading the Jesus Storybook Bible at night to the kids and then discussing what we read afterwards. It is such a beautiful book. The whole book is written as a story of redemption. It reminds us that Jesus didn't come to pay us back but to bring us back.

Interested in a good fiction read. This is one of the best books I have read in years. Lisa Samson is the author. Check out: The Passion of Mary Margaret.

This is the bible study I'm working on. It's called "Get Uncomfortable. Serve the Poor. Stop Injustice. Change the World...In Jesus Name." by Todd Phillips. It is wonderful. It opens with Zecheriah 7:9-10 The Lord of hosts says this: Render true justice. Show faithful love and compassion to one another. Do not oppress the widow or the fatherless. The stranger or the poor...
Last night we had soup for dinner. The kitchen was all cleaned up, thanks to Grace. This morning I noticed that the pot I had cooked soup in was still on the stove. I didn't give it much thought, just thought I'd wash it after the kids went to school. Noah called for me as I was doing laundry, he wanted to show me what Grace was having for breakfast...she had scooped up the old thickened soup that was left out all night and was eating it. She looked at me and happily said "This one I like it." Before I said anything in return I glanced down and noticed she was wearing the sandals she wore in the orphanage. The site of the old soup and the old sandals and my sweet daughter just got me. So much has changed for her. Doesn't she know she doesn't have to eat old soup? Doesn't she know she doesn't have to wear her old shoes. We have better things for her. That's how Jesus feels about us. He has good things for us and so many times we return for what's comfortable instead of whats good.

Love is a verb

2010-01-26T13:13:00.000-08:00

I did not write the following but copied it from someone else. I should have, could have, wish I would have written it.
from Courtney's blog...
"Love is an ACTION word"
I am going to be bold for a moment. Some of you may not like what I am going to say. That's okay. I am getting used to being unliked. There are just so many things on my heart these days and I feel like they need to be said. They keep me awake at night. And since the earthquake in Haiti and the death of Derek Loux, I have been moved to my very core. Bare with me while I try and put all of my swirling thoughts into some semblance of order.

Love is an action word.

Love doesn't sit idle.

Love doesn't stay where it is comfortable.

Love doesn't wait until there is enough money.

Or until all it's ducks are in a row.

Love doesn't need permission or approval from anyone.

Love doesn't worry about reputations.

Love doesn't weigh the cost or avoid sacrifice.

Love doesn't hunker down on the couch with remote in hand, feeling sorry for what it has just witnessed, but never doing a thing about it.

Love doesn't shrugs it's shoulders and let someone else do the work.
Love doesn't turn a blind eye because the problems are too deep and too wide to ever make a difference.

Love doesn't say "I'm not called".

Love is an action word.

Most people assume we are rich. They say things like "Oh you guys are just like Angelina and Brad". Um - yeah. Minus the 10 nannies, the private jets, the 7 mansions, the maids, cooks,the super model good looks, personal trainers..... oh and the MILLIONS upon MILLIONS of dollars. Yeah, we are just like them.

The honest truth is, we are usually broke. We live mostly paycheck to paycheck. We give away what is left. We rely on God to meet our needs. We have a nice life. Nothing extravagant. We have everything we could ever need. Our home is small. We wear hand me downs. And most of the world would consider us very rich. There are people who think we shouldn't be adopting. The fact is this. Whatever we can offer an orphan is going to be a million times better than what they would have had. Like a Mother and Father for example. Like a family.

We have went into every adoption with two pennies to rub together. We never had it ahead of time. And we have watched God provide it every single time. Some people don't agree with that either. They think if you don't have the money upfront, you shouldn't be adopting. It is baffling to me honestly. It is completely acceptable to raise money for
breast cancer research. Or for the Humane Society. Yet raising money to give a child a family is not. There is nothing wrong with giving to those things, but you will never have the joy of seeing the direct outcome of where your money went. Each time we give to an adoption, we have the honor of seeing the child come home, united with their family. We get to see the joy in their eyes. We get to be apart of changing a life forever.

Love is an action word.

If you are an American and you are reading this on your own computer, you are far more privileged than most of the world. You are rich. Just think about it for a moment. You could have been born anywhere in the world. You could have been born in Haiti currently living in a tent. You could have been born in Africa, the 8th child to an HIV positive women who is dying and cannot feed you. You could have been born anywhere. But, you were born here. Have you ever asked yourself why?

I don't think it was so you could live in American suburbia your whole life, work to make yourself as comfortable as possible, retire in a
ovely golf community in Florida , and then die. You were put here for a purpose. It is not an accident you were born into comfort and safety. It was not an accident you have more than most of the world.

When you come to the end of your life you will not regret what you did as much as you will regret what you didn't do.

Our lives weren't meant for comfort and safety. Jesus didn't come and buy a nice house in the suburbs, raise a family, and then die. He didn't sit back and wait for someone else to do something. He didn't shrug his shoulders while the rest of world was dying around him. He gave all that He had. He revolutionized this world. He forever changed religion. His life was marked with suffering and pain. He didn't seek comfort. He acted. He loved.

He was one man.

I am one woman. You are one person. Together we can put love into action. We can put our comfort aside and bury the American dream. Sure it may be hard. You might get hurt. You might not always be safe. You might lose everything. But, you will never regret it. Your life will never be boring. You will find the greatest joy you can ever imagine.

"faith without works is dead." James 2:20

Love is an action word.

Last night I stayed up watching Derek Loux's Memorial service. If you want to be inspired, I highly recommend watching it. What a life he led. I was so incredibly moved by how many lives he touched. He had an enormous heart for the orphan. In fact all over the room were photos of children that he directly helped to be adopted. No one mentioned what degree he held or how much money he made. No one said anything about how successful he was in his career. But over and over again, person after person, spoke of how he loved. I want my life to be like Derek's.
Before the earthquake there were 143 million orphans. That number has greatly risen in the past two weeks. Most of us, if we look around at our lives have the room and the resources for one more child. We can all fit one more. Even me. I can fit one more. I can feed, clothe, and love one more. And I already have ten.

Did you know that if only 7% of Christians took in one orphan, there would be no more orphans in the world?

Imagine a world without orphans.

People think adoption has become popular, fashionable even. That could not be further from the truth. I believe it is the product of an outcry of prayers from those of us who desire to see every orphan have a home. It is a movement in the body of Christ sparked by a spiritual awakening. It is so much more than saving a child's life. It is evangelism in it's very simplest form. Think about it. A child is taken into your home. He once lived in a place where the gospel was not preached. He lived in darkness and oppression. In your home he comes to understand salvation. Think of all of the lives that will be changed from his testimony. It is so much more than saving a life.

Supporting orphanages is not a solution. While orphanages serve a purpose, they do not solve the problem. God's best for a child is a family. A mother and a father. Not growing up in an orphanage. Most orphanages are over crowded. They turn away children because they cannot meet the need. And don't get me started on the foster care system. That is most certainly not a solution. Children need families. God's best for a child is not foster care or an orphanage. It is a family.

More now than ever before we need to come forward. We need to take action. We cannot stay silent and turn a blind eye. In the coming weeks, more and more Haitian orphans are going to need families. But, they aren't just in Haiti. They are in Russia, Africa, and right here in your city. They are all over the world. You can make room for one more. I am sure of it. If I can, you can too. This isn't about waiting until you have all of your ducks in a row. This is about taking action.

Love is an action word."

2010-01-25T10:57:00.000-08:00

My brother came home Friday from Eku, Nigeria. His church helps support an orphanage, a leprosy colony and a seminary. I am so happy my brother got to worship along side our African brothers and sisters. If interested you can see some video @ betheglory.blogspot.com
We had a wonderful weekend alone celebrating our anniversary. Ryan prearranged us a hotel room, sitter (grandparents) dinners and shows for the weekend. It was great fun and good connection time. 6 years and 8 kids. We are wondering if the next 6 years will be as fruitful! lol. Ryan says as long as there are orphans we will have a bed. Don't freak out though, we have no future adoption plans. Each time we have adopted I have known it wasn't the last time. This time though, I feel a different kind of fullness. Maybe it's just to rest for a season, maybe our job now is to help others adopt. Whatever God leads us to we will follow. He has the pen and we are his characters. (What characters we are LOL)
Grace and Manny continue to have a smooth adjustment. I had a meeting this morning with their teachers. All seems to be going well for them. They have dentist appointments on Wednesday. I am expecting an extensive treatment plan.
I am scheduled to go back to work February 17? :-( ? We will see.

Giving

2010-01-21T06:31:00.000-08:00

Simon was very moved for the people of Haiti. When he hears about something or someone who is in crisis he goes into "What can we do?" mode. On our second trip to Ethiopia, he emptied his band account and had us deliver ALL his money to Grace and Manny. On this last trip to get Grace and Manny he gave his money to his Grandmother. Today he is giving the entire contents of his piggy bank to Haiti. $100.00. He earned about 50 bucks a couple of weeks ago shoveling snow in the neighborhood. He worked long and hard in below freezing temperatures. He used ALL that money plus some he'd saved from other projects and put it in an envelope. I am so proud of him. We never prompted him, never implied that he should give away his money. This has led me to think about my own giving. Have you ever given all you had away? Would you? Is that crazy or Christ like? Luke 18:22 tells us the story of the rich young ruler: [22] When Jesus heard this, he said to him, "You still lack one thing. Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me." [23] When he heard this he became sad because he was very wealthy."
Luke 6:20-26 "Blessed are you who are poor, for yours is the kingdom of God.
Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh. Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the son of man.
Rejoice in that day and leap for joy, because great is your reward in heaven. For that is how their fathers treated the prophets.
But woe to you who are well fed now, for you will go hungry.
Woe to you who laugh now, for you will mourn and weep.
Woe to you when all men speak well of you for that is how their fathers treated the false prophets.
Simon knows what is like to be without. He has been without food, water and adequate shelter. He has loved and he has lost. He has then received it again. He gives all. Unfortunately we, as a country, are stuck in the "woe" section of the scripture. Is it easier to give it all when you have only a little? Isn't it easier to understand where all blessings come from if you have few blessings?

Simon this morning having a bagel and tea before school. He looks so old with his hair braided!

The letter he wrote on the outside of his money envelope.

Big sisters are good for...

2010-01-20T06:43:00.001-08:00

Braiding hair, hugs, tickles and helping Mom in the kitchen. :-)

The transition is going well. Mercy has just reached a stage where she is trying to be like Grace instead of trying to tell Grace what to do. She wanted her hair to look just like her "sishters." Her hair is shorter than Grace's hair though.
Today is another big day for the kids. It is their first day of phys ed. Manny was excited but Grace seemed a little nervous. I went last evening and bought her some sneakers. All she had was Chuck's (converse). She was thrilled. Strange thing though, when I buy her new clothes she doesn't wear them. We often have to tell her to wear them. I don't pick out her clothes (I pick out everyone elses at bedtime for the next day)so I don't think she's waiting on permission. Kind of puzzling. There are so many questions I have for the two of them. I just can't wait for them to speak English to find out about their lives.
Our kids school is taking up peanut butter for Haiti. I'm planning to run out in a bit to get some for them. If you need somewhere to donate money our adoption agency has an orphanage there and they need financial support. Their children are safe, but the orphanage has been robbed of all food, water and supplies. One of the nannies was killed and I don't believe they've been able to get her body out. I wish I had an encouraging scripture to type here but I don't. All I know is God IS Good even when life is not.

Weekend photos

2010-01-10T17:16:00.001-08:00

Noah became a brother again! His father and step-mother had their first child, a baby boy, Gabriel. He is beautiful and perfect just like big brother Noah.

We went to Louisville to have dinner at an Ethiopian restaurant with other CCI families (Celebrate Children - our adoption agency). It was great fun! We hope to do it again.

One of the best things that has happened to us this year is this family...the Finleys. They live in the same town and attend the same church we do. They are also adopting from Ethiopia thru CCI!

What do you do with your napkin?

Beniam had a soccer game (indoor) and Dad snapped this pictures of us girls.

The man, the myth the legend...the sweet little boy, Ben.

In a big family, there is never a shortage of hugs, kisses, laughs and laundry :-( What's in your basket?

Brrrrr...cold hands, warm hearts

2010-01-08T11:21:00.000-08:00

The kids had a good first day of school. Everyone was nice to them and they felt somewhat comfortable. Their second day was a snow day, as well as their third! Above is their first snow man with the help of a couple neighbors.

Building with Dad.

Grace made us a delicious meal of spaghetti with homemade sauce.

Manny is enjoying the dogs. This is Happy. Mercy sings Santa Claus is coming to town like this: " You better not pout. You better not mad. You better not be mean to my little dog Happy Hapster..Santa Claus is coming to town."

Ranger is not bothered by the activity of a large family!

Adjusting to life with cold weather.

Movie and cuddle time!

Our backyard at the beginning of the snow. Yes I posted these backwards. HeHe.
As for me, I am so enjoying being home with the kids. They are all wonderful kids and I am so honored to call them mine for the journey.

Adjusting

2010-01-05T15:54:00.001-08:00

People keep asking how the adjustment is going. It's going good. Today the kids had their physicals and tomorrow they will start school. (That is if we have school. No school today because of a dusting of snow.) We decided to put both kids in the same grade and we will shave some time off Grace's age. I was too afraid to put her right in the eighth grade because I believe they'd eat her alive in the 9th grade school next year. She is soooooooooooooooo shy. I had a few moments, well a whole day, where I thought this was not going so well. I contacted a couple of friends who adopted teenagers and ask for their advise. Well just like taking your car to the mechanic and nothing being wrong, the next day Grace started talking. I really believe I was rushing things and she is painfully shy. Today she talked with a friend of ours, Noah's Ethiopian uncle Mebit, she was just explaining to him what she needed to make spaghetti sauce in Amharic and she was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO embarrassed. She was fanning her face and she turned very red. This is a shyness like I've never seen. She is talking to Simon D, right now in fact, in the kitchen, I just heard her say she was not going to marry and Ethiopian man or a faringe (foreigner). I think I said the same thing once upon a time:-)and I married both! LOL. Manny on the other hand is wide open! He has just jumped right in with the other boys. It's funny to me that girl are more likely to be adopted than boys, because boys are so much easier. :-)
If you think of them tomorrow please say a prayer for their protection and guidance at school. While your at it pray for me, their Mom, who will be trying not to worry herself sick.

copied from Wrecked for the ordinary and praying that we all will be!

2010-01-05T15:52:00.000-08:00

The Hardest Thing I've Ever Had to Say

Posted in social justice by Jamie Finch on 1/5/2010

This isn't going to start out any other way than any other thing I have ever written. But it is very much unlike any other thing I have ever written.

Because I don't want to be writing it.

This is one story I do not want to tell. But it is the one story that I need to tell. Because it is the one story you need to read. It's long, but please. There is much to say.

Tonight, I had coffee with a dear friend of mine. Standard event, typical occurrence. But no, not really. Tonight was different. I am so much older than I was yesterday. I am going to break a few rules here and tell you the effect before the cause, her response before what I had said.

She asked me if I ever did yoga.

I answered yes.

She told me something that someone she does yoga regularly with told her once.

"You know how, sometimes, you'll be in those really difficult positions and you become so self aware that you notice something strange about the positioning of some part of your body? (She bent her right middle finger) Like, when your hand is on the mat, and you look down at it and see your finger isn't quite resting as it should and it just looks kind of... ugly. The most important way to respond is to see it. Really see it, notice it for what it is. Call it the ugly that it is. Then accept it for being such, and then soften it. Make it gentle."

Well, no matter how badly I may be fighting this right now and how much I really don't want to do this, this is how I make my ugly into gentle. This is how I soften...

The other night I was coming home late from being out with some friends. Details don't matter; all that matters is that it was late. Really late. The kind of late that turns into early. And I was coming home. I came up out of the train and after taking a few steps, noticed that someone was walking, in near-perfect synchronization, with my pace, just a few steps behind me. I became uncomfortable. I got "that vibe"- every woman knows the one I'm talking about. My phone was dead so there is not much I could have done anyway, except just keep walking. Quickly. So I did.

I made it to my doorstep with this man still behind me, and I began to walk up the stairs. The first step had me feeling like maybe I had misjudged the man and jumped to conclusions too quickly. I was safe. I was home. I was on my front step. But when I reached the second step- I was sexually assaulted. The man reached up my skirt and- to be as delicate as possible- touched me inappropriately. I don't need to expound. You know what I mean.

In all honestly, I have never wanted to cry like a child in my entire life more than at that moment, right there. My knee jerk reaction was to yell, "Oh my god!" and then choke out that sob that wanted so badly to wrench itself out of my body. But in the next instant, I was angry. Livid. Not only because of what he did, but because he made me feel that way. And he was not allowed to make me feel that way. No one is allowed to make me feel that way. So I turned and screamed at him with everything I had in me. "DON'T TOUCH ME! GET AWAY FROM ME!"

He laughed. And walked away.

I cried that night, but functioned fairly normally for the next few days until last night, where a panel conversation among men about sex trafficking had a much deeper effect on me than I expected it to. A poem was read that left me in tears, choking back those same sobs from only 4 nights before, and after the panel, a friend and co-worker asked me if I was alright. I'm an honest person- I said no. We began to walk and talk and I started to tell her how I was feeling and midway through a sentence she stopped, grabbed my arm, looked me in the eye, and asked me if something happened.

After that question, I don't think I stopped crying for an entire hour.

Not just over this situation, another extremely hurtful and fairly demeaning one had occurred recently in my life as well; but in regards to this experience, she suggested I take action against this assault. Seeing as how I never got a good look at the man, I'm not sure if there is much that I can do. But something she said has stayed with me since that conversation. "You're not a victim if you take action."

And while contacting the police might cease to make me feel like a victim externally, more importantly to me, is the necessity of no longer feeling like a victim internally.

And for me, that means to write. The way I process, the way I heal, the way I communicate, is through my written words. And ultimately, as negative as this experience was, it made me connect with and understand something so important to me in a way that I never had before.

When that man took that action against me, something was taken from me in that instant: my value and worth. As a human being. As a woman.

In that moment, I was nothing more than an object that happened to possess the pieces necessary to make him feel a certain way. Turn him on. In that moment, I was treated as property- though never purchased- that he felt he had the right and ability to touch and use for his own pleasure at his own leisure. In that moment, I had no voice, no thoughts, no feelings, no soul, no mind, no emotions, no power, no potential. I only had legs and what lives between them. And he felt entitled to it. Entitled to receive something precious and protected from me without actually knowing or caring anything for me.

This is how I call it what it is:

Ugly. Violent. Shameful. Unacceptable. Wrong.

This is how I accept it for what it is:

Painful. Hurtful. Discriminatory. Disrespectful. Wrenching. Haunting.

This is how I soften it, reign it in, make peace with it, and turn it into something gentle:

I speak. I feel. I tell. I connect. I cry. I learn. I fight.

My horror is matchless to that which they endure day after day, year after year, but my heart stands with them in solidarity- in a more powerful way than I have ever experienced before. I do not stand on that step and cry like a child, I remember my strength and I yell like a woman. And then I remember that I do not yell only for my own sake, but for theirs too. I yell my story, and then I yell theirs louder.

These women, these girls who are sold like cattle, beaten as property, chained like prisoners, and abused like objects. These women, these girls, that have something taken from them 5, 10, 15, 20 times a day. I knew this. But never before had I been in the position of knowing what it feels like to have something taken from you in that way.

Until now.

As someone who has resigned and committed my life to eradicating sexual violence and slavery, I must speak up for myself now that I myself have been affected by a form of sexual violence and assault. I must speak because if I remain quiet, my silence claims that it is acceptable. And anyone who knows me well knows that if you want to fan my fire, ask me if I believe whether or not sexual exploitation, in any form, of women is okay.

Having just completed work on the initial appeal for the Nomi Network holiday campaign, I used the illustration of the power of our stories and shared the story of one of the women working with us in Cambodia (read it here). She was brave enough to share her story with the world, and it was and is my obligation to retell hers and share my own.
And the truth is: We all, each and every one of us, have an obligation to do the same. For if we remain quiet, our silence claims that it is acceptable.

We know what is right, and we know what is wrong. But do we feel it burning in our bones? Do our souls catch fire at the sight of injustice? Has it taken hold of our time, money, thoughts, energy, resources, conversations, lives? Because if not, it is only because we have tragically forgotten that we belong to each other.  

Had I chosen not to share my story and invite you all into in with all the honesty and vulnerability I have in me, I would only have been laying down in the tracks of what I fight against on a daily basis.

This has made me mad as hell.

Beyond that. Outraged. Infuriated. That man was not entitled to lording power over me in any way. No man is entitled to lording any sort of violence or domination or power over any woman in anyway. Ever. What that man did to me was unacceptable. What happens to millions of women around the world every single day is completely unacceptable.

We have got to stop acting like it doesn't matter if it doesn't happen to us or nothing will ever change. We have got to start speaking up, both women AND men, when we see or experience injustice. And we have got to stop pretending like it's not happening. We have all become responsible. And if knowing their horror and knowing their captivity doesn't make you want to scream and cry and fight for freedom with absolutely everything you have, I don't know what ever will.

Welcome home Merry Christmas

2009-12-26T08:35:00.000-08:00

We woke up at 6am on Christmas morning. Ryan and the kids missed their connection and stopped and got a room. Ryan was too sleepy to make the drive from Chicago. They kids sat patiently waiting for them.

A joyful welcome home.

Brothers first hug:-)

After a breakfast at my inlaws and dinner at our house, we, along with my parents went to our Ethiopian families house to celebrate once again. Selamawit Grace was thrilled to see injera (Ethiopian traditional food.)
AFter a long day and jet lag the kids tuck in for their first night home.

What a wonderful Christmas!
"Fall on your knees..Oh hear the angels voices..Oh ni-ight devine. Oh oh night when Christ was born."

Last day, Having some church

2009-12-23T06:10:00.000-08:00

We got up and got ready for church at 8ish. I am feeling a bit depressed. I feel heavy hearted about leaving the other family. I feel sad because we didn’t have our embassy appointment. I feel scared because Derara and I are making an international flight alone. I feel guilty because I am angry that the cooks didn’t fix breakfast yet. Yep, I am ugly.
We are told it is a short walk to Beza International church. I quickly realize it is not so short. These Ethiopians walk everywhere. We finally arrive at the church and can’t go in yet. We are a little early. We meet a missionary family from the US and their children (one adopted from here) and talk a while. They open the door and we file in. It is kind of like a warehouse turned into a church. We take our seats a few rows from the front and shortly the service starts. The place is packed. We start with a word from one of the pastors about his walk with the Lord. He says we are all children of Abraham. However, we not only received the inspiration of Abraham we also received the condition of Abraham. This is why our actions and our beliefs don’t always agree. This is why our thought lives are so difficult for us to manage. I wonder does he know how this “condition” has left me in such a funk this morning?
The worship pastor comes out and says “If there is breath in you today, you owe God a praise.” The music starts for “Let everything that has breath praise the Lord.” We in American churchs can learn so much from the Church in Africa. They know how to praise. They understand the bible in ways we don’t. They know what it means to be the “good shepherd” when the daily see shepherd boys with their sheep on the main streets. They know what it means to be “The bread of life” when people around them are hungry. They know what is means to be the “Living water” when their drinking water is contaminated. They understand the phrase “King of Kings and Lord of Lords” when they have have lived under a King. They know what CS Lewis says in Chronicles of Narnia “He is not a tame Lion, but HE is good.” The Jesus they worship is not the one you can beat up. He is Holy AND Good. I think of in scripture when God told Moses to take of his feet he was walking on Holy ground. I read somewhere that God wanted to be skin to skin with Moses. I am in the presence of brothers and sisters in Christ who are worshipping skin to skin and I feel overdressed. The pastor gets up and we do corporate scripture reading. It is nothing like corporate scripture reading here in the states. It is loud and joyful and people cheer. The pastor talks about people facing mountains in their live and that mountains melt in the presence of our God. He asks if anyone wants to come up for prayer and many go forward including Ryan and I. We are prayed over by an African man and I am feeling more and more free.
We go back to our seats and the sermon begins. It is about giving. It is a sermon about giving like none I’ve ever heard. It clearly in the beginning is not the prosperity gospel. It is about how our giving is about obedience and it is also our opportunity to participate in the ultimate sacrifice of Christ on the cross. It is an amazing sermon and I hope I can find them online and participate from a distance in what is going on in this place.
We have a lazy day until the wee hours when Derara and I check in at the airport. We say our goodbyes. I fight off tears. I know it is a short goodbye. I no longer feel scared. I thank God for being the melter of mountains.

More from me after our first Christmas together. Thank all of you who prayed for us, donated money or offered us encouragement. You are valuable.

Day 8, Feel like someone punched me in the gut

2009-12-23T06:07:00.000-08:00

We woke up that morning, quickly dressed and went to get Iella. We skipped showering etc, until we get back the guest house, for obvious reasons. Ryan has mosquitos bites on his forehead as big as silver dollars. I pray we don’t contract malaria as I scratch the bites on my legs. We go to the patio and wait for Iella. We think we will order a macchiato and but no one comes to take our order. Iella comes out and we get in the car and drive a little ways to the main strip. We get out and go in to get our macchiato. There are no ladies here, just men. I think I’m missing something. We take a table. I am causing quite a stir and wonder if we should leave. The waiter comes over and tells us they have no macchiato. We go to two more places in search of the blessed liquid. We find a Kenyan place in a fairly large building and we climb the steps. They have macchiato. I have two. Iella laughs at me. While I’m drinking it there is a program on the tv about morbidly obese Americans….hmmm maybe I shouldn’t use sugar in my drink. I get up to go to the bathroom and find what you find in most public Ethiopian bathrooms…..filth. The ladies has no seat and it is literally black with filth all over it. The smell makes me gag and I decide to hold it until it comes out my ears before I’ll go in there, squatting is not even an option. I hold back the urge to vomit my macchiato up and go to get the men so we can run some errands for Biruk before picking up the kids.
We arrive at the shanty and everyone comes to give us hugs and kisses. Derara looks a little haggard. He slept on the floor fully clothed. The other kids look fine, as this is how they have lived until two months ago. We are served breakfast, pasta with vegetables and it is delicious. Then we are served coffee. My bladder is already full, but I can’t offend the cook. After visiting with the everyone, we say our goodbyes. This is it. We are leaving Biruk. I feel like someone punched me in the gut. I climb in the car and can’t stop crying. Ryan is sobbing. Guta is wiping his eyes. Selamawit and Derara just sit there. Maybe they have no tears left. We are leaving their biological family. They feel like our family now. I wasn’t expecting this ammount of pain at this goodbye. We cuddle in the backseat. I put one earbud in and turn on Shane and Shane, I give the other to Derara so he can listen too. My face is in the window, the sun on my skin and the wind hitting me, the tears begin to dry. We drive two hours back to Addis, forever a little different…….I still need to pee.

Day 7, Meeting Grandma

2009-12-23T05:33:00.000-08:00

We went to the embassy this morning and they would not interview us today. They said Monday was the best they can do. We were scheduled to fly out Sunday night. Ryan is making calls to find us an exchange flight. I am quite upset. I am very homesick. I will probably have to fly home with Simon Derara and Ryan and the other kids will come after they get their visas. I have never flown alone before. This has always been a fear for me.
We traveled to Weliso to visit the kids family. Our first stop was the Emanuel orphanage. . Eyob is the director of this orphanage and he invited us to visit and partake in the coffee ceremony. The kids are quite anxious to see older brother, Biruk, but agree that we should go. On our way, driving down a dirty dust road we saw Biruk!!! What a surprise. He was in his rickshaw. He jumped out and gave hugs all around. He followed us on to the orphanage. Eyob had a quite intimidating appearance. He is tall, black as night, has heavy curly hair and big gummy smile. He looks like an African warlord, but is in fact a kind, gentle Christian man. The kids all ran out to see us and shake our hands, many yelling Faringie, Faringie. (The native word for foreigner.) He gave us a tour of the grounds, the boys room, the girls room, the baby room. The baby room was empty, we were told there was an outbreak of malaria and the babies were moved into the city until they could be safely at the orphanage. We were a little disappointed. Derara and I were wanting to have another baby party like we did at the CCI house. We were introduced to pastor of the orphanage. The area is conservative Muslim and this guy is opening his own church on the back of the property. The only thing that adorns the walls are scriptures. We are shown Eyobs office and the church. To say this place was a pitiful sight is an understatement. To look at the place, it looks uninhabitable. But it is very inhabited. 45+ children call this place home. I feel Jesus presence stronger in an orphanage than anywhere else in the world. Eyob leads us to the kitchen and there we are served coffee. They have the place fixed nice for us. Plastic table clothes, cans with flowers in them. I feel unworthy of being in this space in time. They have nothing and are still going all out for us.
Next we travel closer to grandmothers house. We stop along the way to visit the kids fathers brother, Birhanu. He lives in a oromia thatched roof hut with his wife and two children. They invited us in to look around their home. I had never been in a home that looked like this. It had dirt floors and dirt walls with newspapers on them. They treated us kindly and I wondered to myself “Is this how Derara lived as a small child.” I had been to his brothers shanty but not to his grandmothers house.
We traveled off the road onto a dirt road and stopped when it became impassable. We made the rest of the journey on foot. Then she saw us…hugs and tears around. This is the house Simon and Kaleab lived in as small children.
She tells us that Derara was very sick when he was little. She thought he might die. She gave him a nickname that means “God is with us”. She gave also Kaleab Mercy a nickname and though I cannot remember the name I remember that it meant “The cross of Christ.” I look at where my kids came from and I begin to cry. I have been at my emotional breaking point all day and this tender moment I had the privilege to witness was my undoing. “God is love. God is Holy. “ In this moment I am seeing his character.
She keeps her arms around Derara from the time she sees him. She tells us she is so happy. She keeps thanking us for all we have done for her family. I never feel like we have done anything. But this time I see it through her eyes. Her daughter died. She loved her and misses her still. She wasn’t able to care for the grandchildren. She is too poor…and on another continent a family puts her daughters children back together. They won’t be naked, they won’t be hungry and they will be together. I am so thankful to be the instrument of joy for this woman.
We walk back to the vehicle and say our goodbyes. I don’t know if this is the last time the kids will see their grandma or not, but I know we all will always remember this day.
We drive back out to Biruks shanty. It is a four room structure and 3 people each have their own room and one room, the room that my children lived in is empty. We go in and talk. While everyone is talking, I am handed a small tattered photo album. I go outside so I can clearly see it and I am stopped in my tracks. Their biological parents. My eyes are locked with the eyes of my kids Mom and Dad. She is small and looks like Selamawit. He is tall and muscular and looks like our own Sweet D. This is such a treasure. I begin taking pictures of the photo pages. There are a couple pictures of my kids when they were smaller. Kaleab Mercy as a baby. Selamawit as a baby. It looks like the family was doing well when Selamawit and Biruk were babies. That is when the most pictures were taken. There are few pictures after that time. I return the photo album and sit down for dinner. Their fathers sister is the cook in the area and she fixes us traditional Ethiopian food. It is quite good. She is happy with our compliments. We talk to Biruk about his future and how we can help him. We make some plans. It is getting late and dark and the kids are tired. They decide they’d like to spend the night in the room with Biruk. I look around and see a few stools, homemade border on the walls, one small pallet on the floor and an old suitcase in the corner. “Where will you sleep?” I asked Derara. He says he will sleep in the floor and wants to stay. We kiss them all goodnight and take off to our hotel room.
On the way to the room Iella, our cab driver tells us this is one his favorite days. “We made the old lady so happy.” It is one of my favorite days too and I am happy he was with us. We have drinks on the patio when we arrive at the hotel. I am a little leery of going in the room and want to stretch out the night. When my eyes become too heavy we walk to our sleeping quarters.
I have never been a more pitiful hotel room. It cost us 7 dollars!!! Can you imagine? I’m afraid my pictures of it don’t do it justice.

I am afraid to climb in the bed. The mosquito netting has holes in it. The bathroom stinks. I tried to talk Ryan into getting back in the car driving to the city but he will not. I am reminded of my earlier struggle with being a spoiled American and I let sleep have me. At least I am creating a memory right?

Day 6, my prayer closet

2009-12-23T05:32:00.000-08:00

We just hung out here at home today. We have been trying to resolve an issue with the kids passports. They gave them the wrong birthdates and the embassy would not take them. In these birthdates they were 6 months a part in age and they said that wasn’t possible for biological siblings. So the day we got here we received new birth certificates with new ages (correct ones). We then had to go to immigration to get new passports. Our embassy appointment was supposed to be today and we did not get Selamawits passport. We went on to the embassy to talk to them about it and they were closed. So if we don’t get it tomorrow we won’t come home Monday. This left me feeling particularly bummed. So bummed in fact, I had to try my best to keep it together. I don’t have a very good poker face though and folks were asking me what’s wrong. As soon as we got back to the guest house I ran up to the bedroom and closed the door. I shed a few tears and Ryan came in and we talked a bit. I asked him to call home and check on everybody but not to give me the phone. I knew if I heard anyones voice at home I’d started crying all over again. I guess I’m home sick. I was home sick one time when I was a little girl. It isn’t a good feeling. Selamawit came in the room to get her “chruch musica” that she picked out yesterday. This sweet daughter of mine is already ministering to me. I followed her lead and got my iphone out and put my ear buds in and listened to Shane and Shane. I consider this my prayer closet. I went down stairs and sat with Selamawit as she listened to her “Church Musica”. I began to sing aloud “ I was dead in my sin, you came in yeaaaaaaaaaaaaah. You made a way when there was no way. You covered heaviness with garments of praise. You wrote a song and your singing it over me….”
I left my buds in and we walked across the busy street to find some dinner. I passed a lady with her infant on the side of the road and I stopped and gave her some money. Selamawit was so happy to see this. I can feel the spoiled American beginning to slip away.

Day 5, swimming and sun

2009-12-23T05:26:00.000-08:00

The weather here is amazing. It is crisp and cool in the early mornings and late evenings, warm in the middle of the day. If feels like a warm fall day but looks like summer time year around. It really is perfect weather. We spent the day at the Hilton and went swimming. It was the first time swimming for my kids and Guta got in the water and immediately started to dog paddle, very shortly later he was swimming and even racing Derara across the pool! Selamawit did not swim though. I think her modesty won out and she didn’t want to put on her suit. She wagged her finger no at me and said “In Amedica”. I felt sorry for her just sitting there so I took her to the salon to let her get her hair done. She picked a braided do from a poster of braids. It looked lovely. Then, the boys wanted to get there hair done so we took them.
That evening we went to Fasika for traditional dancing and food.

Day 4 spoiled American

2009-12-23T05:25:00.000-08:00

Today I had a litany of complaints. The shower wasn’t warm. It also is outside on the balcony. The toilet isn’t flushing and it is dirty. We are all staying in the same room. When I woke up at 2:00 because I couldn’t sleep I had to wait hours for coffee. Even after the cooks were awake the coffee wasn’t ready for an hour. I miss high speed internet. I can access facebook but not my email or my blog. I miss TV. I would love to say I’m so super spiritual that I don’t but I do. I miss my family.
Did I mention I saw a man crawling up the street because he has no feet? Did I mention there are mothers and babies sleeping on the streets with simple shawls as a covering? Did I mention I saw an elderly lady totally naked washing her body in the sewer? Did I mention you can see all the ribs of the dogs and cows and goats that walk these main streets? Did I mention there are 5 million people in this city and 3 million orphaned children in this country? No, I guess I didn’t mention that.
This day has revealed to me how far I have to go. I am ever thankful that he who began a good work in me will carry it out to the day of Christ Jesus. May he protect me from my selfishness.

Day 3, our kids

2009-12-23T05:20:00.000-08:00

We arrived at the guest house at 4am. We were greeted by our case manager, Sue, on arrival. She told me “I have a surprise for you.” In my mind I was like “There are more kids. NO couldn’t be…” We walked up the three flights of stairs to our room and out ran our kids! We were expecting to see them later in the day. Selamawit came straight to me and embraced me and bawled. She was crying so hard that I think everyone around us was crying. Guta went straight to Derara and wrapped him up. When they broke their embrace hugs and tears were shared around the room. Than we began the dance of smiles that we are still doing. With no shared language between us we just smile at each other. It’s awkwardly comfortable.
After we’d had a couple of hours of sleep, I joined Sue downstairs and she told us of the things she has learned about our kids. They have a BIG faith. Selamawit wants to be an evangelist. They told her their mother came to Christ a month before she died. We walked to a local restaurant for lunch and coffee/tea. Guta (Manny) has not let go of Derara for more that a minute or two! Everywhere we walk he has his arm around him or is holding his hand. Maybe he is afraid he will slip away from him again. Selamawit walks shyly occasionally taking my hand. She is so delicate and feminine. She is truly lovely.
The first evening brings us to the transition house that has been our kids home for a couple of months. Wow! There are so many beautiful children. I wallowed in babies. It was so much fun. We were all carrying babies around. The older kids sang for us and came curiously around to talk to us. There are truly a great group of children there. The wonderful part of being in a transition house is that all these kids have families working toward bringing them home. There is Hope in the house.
Before we left the house, Selamawit Grace and Guta Amanuel went upstairs to pray with the staff…We bid our farewells to the beautiful people we may never see again this side of heaven, but will never forget.
We arrived back at the guest house and then set out on foot to the Imperial Hotel for dinner. Derara had an insatiable attack of the giggles that got all of us started. Ryan well…the vomitting began at the hotel….

Day 2, Istanbul

2009-12-23T05:18:00.000-08:00

Turkish airways was nice. We flew into Instanbul at 9am their time. I had a fever and a headache. We rented a airport hotel room for 6 hours and slept. Then we spent too much money on dinner and went to our gate. Our plane was delayed -really delayed.
To sum up our experience in Turkey…sick…tired…gone.

Day 1, The journey begins…well sort of...

2009-12-23T05:11:00.000-08:00

The journey begins…well sort of
We woke up this morning to the smell of coffee and breakfast cooking, thanks to my dear mother. Then we bid our farewells. The goodbye is always tearful for me. I will miss my kids. I always wonder “what if”. What if this is it? What if I don’t see them anymore. Do they know? Do they know I love them? Do they know I want only the best for them? Did my life speak of a loving God? Overly dramatic? Yep. But I'm like that sometimes.
We took a rental, compliments of the dear ex-husband to the Cinci airport. (If you don’t know the story of my ex husband, ask me sometime. It’s another story of Gods grace and faithfulness.) I am sitting in the coffee shop at that airport as we speak. Ryan gave Simon D and I both a copy of our passports and a 100 dollar bill to carry in our pockets. As we sat looking out the window I asked Simon “If you could keep your $100.00 what would you do with it?” He very passionately said “I’d give it to my grandma.” I’m thinking his sweet grandma is about to get 100 dollars richerJ My pleasure.
I look at my handsome son, Derara and I am overwhelmed with emotion. What a journey this life has taken him on. Three years ago he lay in his new bed crying for his brother and sisters. Last year he was reunited with our own little Mercy Bond. In two short (well not so short) days he will have his other brother and sister back. He will get to visit his grandma. Get to visit the very place he was born. Go back in time, if only for a little while, if you ever can really go back in time.

We board our flight in a bit to JFK. Then we ride Turkish airways to Istanbul. Maybe I’ll chat more then….

Story

2009-12-08T14:38:00.000-08:00

This picture really is worth a thousand words. I wonder what she is writing. I wonder about the map on the wall. Did she put it there? Or did the staff? Has she searched for Kentucky? Does she even know she is coming to Kentucky? Maybe all she knows is that she's coming to the US. Our case manager had this to say about her, "She just wants to serve the Lord." Maybe she is looking at that map and thinking of the peoples around the world who don't know Jesus. Maybe she writing scritures in her notebook. When we met her she had scriptures on her walls at home. In fact that was ALL that was in the room, just papers on the wall she had written verses on. SHE has lessons to teach us all. The WORD is all we really need. "The word was with God and the word was God." John 1:1. Saturday sweet Grace and Manny, Saturday we begin the travel to bring you home.

Thanksgiving

2009-11-29T15:53:00.000-08:00

Psalm 107:1
Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.
We had a wonderful Thanksgiving, much to be thankful for. My brother and his family came to stay with us a couple nights, as well as my Mom and Dad. We headed to Cincinnati for Thanksgiving dinner at my Aunt and Uncles home. This was the first Thanksgiving my brothers children celebrated, having came from Ukraine in the Spring. We love them so much, hard to imagine that haven't yet been home for a year. We celebrated one year on November 21 for our little Mercy Bond. Tomorrow we will be booking our flight to Ethiopia to pick up Manny and Grace!
For more pictures of our Holiday see http://betheglory.blogspot.com

God is so Good!

2009-10-21T14:37:00.000-07:00

It is official. We had a successfull court date today in Ethiopia. We are oficially the parents of Selamawit (Grace) and Guta (Maney - Amanuel). And here they are:

Like Mike?

2009-10-20T13:27:00.000-07:00

Isnt he gorgeous? :-)
Court date tomorrow for...drum roll.....new names: Grace and Maney (short for Amanuel).

Court Date Goodness!!!!!

2009-10-16T08:52:00.000-07:00

Our court date is October 21st! Next week!!!!!! Please join with us in prayer to get together the rest of the money. God is Good. He is so Good to me.
We're coming for you Selamawit and Guta!! Can't wait to hug you and kiss you and have you home for Christmas!!

Reflections

2009-10-14T17:06:00.001-07:00

Just finished Donald Miller's book "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years." It is strange how emotion evoking I find his books. If you are familiar with him, he is known for being funny. His popular book "Blue Like Jazz" is being made into a movie. It is my favorite book. Not because of the depth of his theology, but because of the depth of his humility. After reading a Donald Miller book I feel like I just listened to my favorite song or watched a sappy movie, which is strange really because he is not a sappy guy. This particular book made me reflect on my story, the one still in the works, the one this side of heaven. I remember when I was a single Mom, just learning about who I was, who I am in Christ, the only thing I wanted was a Christian man. A Christian man is really hard to find. I have one. My husband is the greatest. I am afraid I have taken him for granted. I am so so thankful for Ryan. It doesn't matter what he does to irritate me, that is the small stuff. It matter that he is following Jesus and HE is in control of the pen that has written Ryan and I in this story together. If you are reading this Ryan, and I hope you are, I love you. I am honored to be in this epic with you, my hero. May our story live on in our children and may they know the ultimate author.

Weekend fun!

2009-10-11T15:58:00.000-07:00

We had a busy weekend. Saturday Morning we went to the Zoo. It was Mercy's first trip to the zoo. After seeing the animals we went to eat Ethiopian food, which is all of our favorites! After we got home the girls went out for a little shopping and the men went to football practice/party. Sunday (today) we went to church then to Simon D's football game followed by Noah's soccer game. Enjoy the pictures! We will hopefully receive our court date this week!! Ryan is meeting with a gentleman tonight who game us 10,000 books to have a book sale for a fundraiser. Running out of time, can't wait to see God at work in this one.

2009-10-11T15:47:00.000-07:00

I had a dream...

2009-10-07T07:43:00.000-07:00

The time is getting close. We should get the date for our court date next week. About 6 weeks after our court date we will travel to pick up our kids. Last night I dreamed of them and dreamed of Ethiopia, the smell of exhaust:), a wood fire and incense, the coolness of the morning air and heat of the afternoon sun on our skin. Laughter. Tears. Love. Can't wait to be there my friends.

Beautiful

2009-10-05T11:49:00.000-07:00

I don't know this lady, but a friend of mine sent me this in an email. I love it. Grab a tissue. Or am I just hormonal? :-)

Have I ever regretted being obedient to God?
Lysa TerKeurst

Have I ever regretted being obedient to God?
Most of you are familiar with how my beautiful sons came into my life. If you are not familiar with the story that aired on Oprah on Friday, you can see it at the bottom of the post found by clicking here.

God brought our boys home in an amazing way. But I have to admit, it was not an easy decision or one we took lightly.

Basically, when it came right down to it, we adopted our boys out of pure obedience to God.

We said yes to God’s invitation to become Mark and Jackson’s parents not because it was part of our plan, not because we had enough white space in our schedules, and definitely not because we had the money to fund two international adoptions. We brought them home because God told us to do it.

And then we fell in love.

So, now all these years later, it might be natural to ask me if we regret being obedient to God in this situation. Very few people would be bold enough to ask, but I bet many have wondered.

I can tell you, I've never once regretted saying yes. I love my boys and can not imagine my life without them. But there have been hard days.

Not because the boys are adopted but rather because they are kids that need parenting. Personally, I've found parenting all of our kids to be incredibly challenging. Motherhood is a wondrous mix of the hardest stuff mixed with the best of everything.

So, at the end of the day I have to ask myself, is the best in life found at the end of the easiest routes or the ones that require perseverance?

For me, what started as the faintest whimper of a yes to God eventually caused a glorious break in the dam of my heart. Eventually.

I may not live the easiest life. But, I do rejoice in the overflow of obedience. And no, I don't regret it. Not even in the slightest.

Today my sweet friend Renee is walking her journey of obedience and crazy love. I'd love for you to pop over to her place and overwhelm her with prayers, support, and encouragement.

A beautiful video my Mom made of my son, Noah

2009-10-03T17:06:00.001-07:00

http://secure.smilebox.com/ecom/openTheBox?sendevent=4d5445304d446b334e7a553d0d0a&blogview=true&campaign=blog_instructions_directurl_makeyourown

Copy and paste it into your browser.
Isn't he just beautiful? (BIG SMILE)
Good news to report: We had a three day yardsale with some friends who are also adopting from Ethiopia. We made a combined 2,000.00! God provides. Not always when or how we want him to, but he provides. I received a promotion and a large raise this week. Now I'd really like to NOT work but right now the money is very helpful!

Worship

2009-09-30T13:45:00.000-07:00

When orphans worship, their voices are loud, their eyes are closed tightly, and their little hands are gripped together. Your jaw will drop as you watch them physically enter into the presence of a king.

When orphans worship, their voices ache to express their hearts. Their songs are ones of desperation and admiration to a creator who they know holds them in his palm.

When orphans worship, your eyes fill with tears as you feel God all around you. Physically, you are overcome and spiritually you are one with your Lord.

When orphans worship, their last care in the world is what you, I, or their friend thinks of them. They sing loud, undignified, and with passion.

When orphans worship, you begin to wonder if this is what it is supposed to be like for us. You begin to wonder why God's presence is so strong there, but we struggle to enter into any meaningful worship in our clean, well lit, and finely carpeted buildings.

When orphans worship, you are easily convinced that there is nothing else on their minds. Their deep expressions can tell you a thousand stories about the throne room.

When orphans worship, their instruments are their voices and the clap of their hands, but you'd probably swear you also could hear percussion, guitars, and booming pianos.

When orphans worship, they appear as though they have learned something we haven't. While you and I find it so hard to believe that we have a God who loves and desires us, they take no interest in such foolishness.

Copied from Wrecked for the Ordinary.

Treasure

2009-09-28T15:24:00.000-07:00

Fundraisers!

2009-09-19T12:17:00.000-07:00

I am selling handmade/homemade yoga mat bags. They are $15.00 a piece. They are sized for the standard yoga mat. Draw string top. Pocket on front for keys and/or water bottle. Adjustable shoulder strap. These would be excellent gifts for anyone who uses a yoga mat. I attend boot camp and we use mats. It is difficult to carry your mat, your keys, your phone, your water etc. Christmas ain't far away ladies:-)

Next weekend we will be having a yard sale in The Belvedere. If you can not attend please pray for us to have a good turnout.

Blessings!

Mulan!!

2009-09-12T18:05:00.001-07:00

Noah was in the gifted and talented play Mulan tonight. Here are a few pictures of our great evening.

good potential

2009-09-08T13:31:00.001-07:00

Weekend with family

2009-09-07T13:36:00.001-07:00

We had a fun filled long weekend in Mississippi with my brother and his family. All the kids got along wonderfully. It was such a blessing to see little ones from Ukranian and little ones from Ethiopia playing together, being family. We went in to New Orleans briefly for dinner at my favorite restaurant and then to Cafe du Monde for Beignets and coffee. We went to a USM football game, Beniam is photo'd above jamming. Sunday we went to church to hear my wonderful brother preach. Great weekend. Met some wonderful people. Need to rest up now:-)

The critics

2009-09-02T11:41:00.000-07:00

From Brenan Mannings book, The Signature of Jesus:

Only when we clam the love of the crucified Christ with heartfelt conviction, this love that transcends all judgements, can we overcome all fear of judgement. As long as we continue to live as if we are what we do, as if we are what we have, and as if we are what other people think about us, we will remain filled with judgements, opinions, evaluations, and condemnations. We will remain addicted to the need to put people in their place.

Yet to the extent that we embrace the truth that our core identity is not rooted in our success in ministry, or in popularity with kids and parents or with power in the local church, but in the passionate, pursuing, infinite - what GK Chesterton calls "Furious" love of God embodied in his crucified Son - to that degree we can let go of our need to judge our friends, spouses, children, pastors, gays, straights, Asians, Caucasions, and the sin- scarred wino on the street. We can be free from the need to judge others by claiming for ourselves the truth, "I am the disciple whom Jesus loves."

Sold Out

2009-08-29T17:20:00.000-07:00

The following is a quote from a pastor from Zimbabwe found in his office after his martyrdom for his faith:

I'm part of the fellowship of the unashamed. I have the Holy Spirit's power. The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has been made - I'm a disciple of his. I won't look back, let up, slow down, back away, or be still. My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, my future is secure. I'm finished and done with low living, sight walking, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tamed visions, worldly talking, cheap giving, and dwarfed goals.
I no longer need preeminence, prosperity, position, promotions, plaudits, or popularity. I don't have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised, regarded, or rewarded. I now live by faith, lean in his presence, walk by patience, am uplifted by prayer, and I labor with power.
My face is set, my gait is fast, my goal is heaven, my road is narrow, my way rough, my companions are few, my Guide reliable, my mission clear. I can not be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, turned back, deluded, or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the presence of the enemy, pander at the pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of mediocrity.
I won't give up, shut up, let up, until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up, preached till all know, and work till he stops me. And, when he comes for his own, he will have no problem recognizing me...my banner will be clear!

I encourage you to read this aloud to someone. Amazing.

Be the faith

2009-08-26T14:34:00.000-07:00

James 1:21-22 "Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves.

Sacrificial giving

2009-08-25T13:43:00.000-07:00

We have been going thru quite alot internally. I say we, my family, but I guess honestly I have been going thru it and brining it to them. A couple of weeks ago we heard a sermon at church on giving. Not, giving out of abundance, not giving the 10%we don't even miss - giving sacrificially. Not just of our resources either, but of our time.
We have been attending a new church and haven't really plugged in anywhere yet. When mulling over volunteer commitments in my mind I was thinking of the things I could do that involved the least ammount of, well, me. Maybe I could be a once a month greeter, or maybe I could work serving coffee one Sunday morning a month. Really I am a sacrificial kind of person right?....wrong:-(
These thoughts led me to an inventory on idolatry in my life. What are my idols, I wondered? Vanity - not for my abundance of beauty, but rather my desire to be and feel beautiful. Could be an idol. Then my mind started looking at other people's idols. Food? Naw I think, not me. I'm just a teeny bit overweight. It's the obese who have a food idol. Right???? Wrong again. All it took was reflecting on where I spend my money and the things I "Love" - food.
Where does that lead me?
Well first of all, as far as giving financially we are doing what we can. We give our tithe and the rest, when there is a rest, goes to our adoption.
My time? I signed up this week to work with middle school stundents. This is something I have long thought I'd be gifted at and I am very excited.
The whole food idolatry thing...I'm currently low carb. If you think you have no food addictions (and I might remind you, addictions are never good, though we so oft normalize them) go without carbs for a couple of days. We ARE so addicted! I am again eating a vegetarian diet (not because I think eating meat is wrong. The vegetarian thing is a chapter for another book). My big idea right now is to get rid of all the food in the house. Empty the cupboards and donate the food to charity and buy my food/our food each day. Maybe that would give us some grasp of words like "Give us this day our daily bread." I want to make the decision to only purchase incredients or foods that God gave the earth. Nothing processed, no fast food. If we only had food enough for a meal would we appreciate that meal? Would we give thanks and mean it? Would we spend the time to know that our Creator God gave us food to nourish our bodies. If our bodies were better nourished, would we then have the presence of mind to nourish our souls?
Practically speaking, would our grocery bill go down? Would it go up? Would it matter if we were buying the foods that God gave us and nothing more? Isn't that a more respectable way to spend the money that HE has given us.
The vanity idol - don't have that one figured out yet. I'll let you know when I do. Right now I am resting in the fact that there are bigger issues in the world (and in me) than restling with 10ish pounds of excess body weight. There are people outside our gates who are starving too death, while we get fatter and fatter. There are people who have no homes, while we spend our money and energy decorating ours. There are people outside the gate who have no transportation, while we "pimp" our rides. There are children, children I have met who have on nothing but rags, while America charges its way into great debt for clothes. I don't know about you but this is NOT alright with me.
I have often heard women say "MY husband and my kids are my ministry." Really? I don't feel that way at all. Though I know my salvations was a free gift of grace, it doesn't come without some change in my life and heart. How can we have? and know? and be? and not share. "Our lives are not our own. We have been bought with a price."

donations

2009-08-24T08:41:00.002-07:00

If you would like to donate to help us bring our two children home please feel free to use the paypal button to the right. Thank you.

fun pics and update

2009-08-08T17:28:00.001-07:00

My big girl got her ears pierced last night. This morning while she was in the bath tub and I was cooking breakfast, she shaved off a portion of her hair! Great timing since school starts Monday.
Noah recently played a thief in a bible school play at Harmony Christian Church. He decided to eat the loaf of bread he stole.
We just counted up the donations we received from the fundraiser plus a couple other donations and we are still short 5,000.00$!!!!! I thought we'd have it all by now:(
Pray that more funds come our way.
Blessings!

Bonded By Love

2009-08-03T13:05:00.001-07:00

The benefit dinner was a success. Noah and Mercy helped. The little blond is Mercy's "best friend" Josie. Whose Mom is a wonderful friend to me. We raised 1300.00 and still have some money coming our way from people who couldn't make it. Rebecca Maas, who's blog is on the side bar, and Kristi Smith, both told the stories of thier adoption(s). A very moving night.

Auntie me!

2009-07-21T17:04:00.000-07:00

We just returned from our family vacation to St George Island. We had a wonderfully restful time. My favorite part of the trip was meeting my new nieces and my nephew from Russia. I didn't really expect any emotional feelings upon meeting them, but almost instantly I was choked up. It was touching to see my brother in the role of father. They are shaping into excellent parents and I am very proud of both he and Kim.

slow to post

2009-07-21T16:58:00.001-07:00

We are selling shirts as a fund raiser. They are organic cotton, brown, 12 dollars. We ar out of XL. Beniam is sporting one. Every life does count. I am abundantly be blessed to call him my son.

Beach birthday

2009-07-15T12:25:00.001-07:00

Our baby turned 5. We decided to wait a few days to have her party on vacation. She picked out the party dress and wanted a little dolled up. The expression when we sang to her was priceless.